Shoulder to Shoulder

Shoulder to Shoulder

Text: John 15:9-15

Exactly one month before the pandemic began, I got away for a few days with some of my best friends in the world.

Stasia and I have been friends since Kindergarten. 

Cara and I were assigned to the same table group in fourth grade. 

Jana moved into town in seventh grade. 

And somewhere in between, Anna and Theresa rounded out our small group. 

We forged our friendship in those awkward and complicated years of middle school, where boyfriends changed all the time and school work increased and you never knew who was in and who was out. 

But we fit together.  We somehow found a way through high school and cheered one another on.  We made mistakes and had fights and stayed up way too late making silly home videos. 

When we all went our separate ways in college, we began to drift and build new lives…

To be honest, there have been times when there is little that we hold in common, but the bond that we forged is stronger than acquaintances that have come and gone.

Even after twenty-five years, we still try to get together at least once a year to catch up. 

Throughout the pandemic, we’ve texted and called and been more connected than perhaps we have been in the last few years. 

Somehow this time of isolation has also been a time to really touch base with your people.

The ones that you know will always be there. 

Through thick and thin, and joys and struggles.   

I know some of you have friends like that in your life.

Whether it is your sister or bible study partner or neighbor or your friend from elementary school.

People that are there for you no matter what and who make you a better person.

And people for whom you are willing to do the same. 

As we continue this week to think about what it means to practice resurrection, we find ourselves once again in the farewell speech of Jesus in John’s gospel.

And if we didn’t get the message last week… or the week before that… or any of the other twelve times it shows up in the New Testament… here it is again:

“This is my commandment: love each other just as I have loved you.” (John 15:12)

This isn’t a suggestion or a recommendation.

The Word of God is standing before the disciples and giving them a new commandment.

A commandment on par with the greatest commandment – to love God with all of our heart and soul and mind and strength and to love our neighbor as ourselves.

This goes one step farther.

We are commanded to love others in the way Jesus has loved us.

And then Jesus goes on to tell us what that love looks like.

It looks like sharing your life with your friends… putting your life on the line for your people. 

If we do this… we are his friends.

Now, I don’t know about you, but usually my friends don’t go around commanding me to do things.

When I hear the word “command” my mind goes to the word “obey.” 

And I obey largely because someone or something has authority over me. 

Because I recognize their power to speak truth and direction into my life. 

But Jesus turns this idea upside down.

He rejects the idea that he is our master and we are slaves or servants. 

Jesus calls us friends. 

I think to understand this, we might need to go back and remember what it means to be a friend in the time of Jesus. 

If we go back to the original Greek, Jesus uses the word philos to describe this kind of relationship. 

It is rooted in philia, one of the four ancient Greek words for love, and the one usually referred to as “brotherly love.” 

Think – Philadelphia. 

When Aristotle wrote about philia, some three hundred years before Jesus was born, he described friendship as a kind of mutual affection between two parties.

But it goes beyond simply feelings; philia is wanting good for another person, for their sake and not your own.  And, it is actively working, as far as you can, to help that good come into being.  (Aristotle, Rhetoric)      

That is deeper than mere camaraderie or getting together to watch a game or share a hobby.  

C.S. Lewis, as he reflects upon these four types of love says that in romantic love, eros, two people stand face-to-face, eyes on one another.

But in philia love, you stand shoulder-to-shoulder, facing the world. You find your place alongside another and your strengths become their strengths. You urge one another on to accomplish something larger than yourself.

“To the Ancients,” he writes, “Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue.  The modern world, in comparison, ignores it.” 

We can all think of acquaintances and people that we hang out with… people we might call friends.

But it is far more difficult to name those people who stand by our side, shoulder-to-shoulder, facing the world. 

The ones we choose to walk alongside through triumph and tragedy.

The people for whom we are willing to set aside our own needs for theirs.

People that know us intimately… all of our secrets, all of our warts, all of our dreams… and who we know intimately in return.

But this is the kind of relationship that Christ wants to have with us.

Jesus knows us inside and out… and he wants us to know him fully.

He wants us to throw in our lot with him, to abide in him, to give 100% of our lives to his cause.

He wants to stand side-by-side with us, shoulder-to-shoulder, working to build the kingdom.

He wants to help us navigate the ups and downs of life and believes that when we walk together, abiding in God’s love, our joy might truly be complete.

You see, like a philos, like a friend, Jesus was willing to lay down his own life for our ultimate good. 

Not for his sake, but for ours. 

In a relationship between a master and slave, the slave obeys out of fear or out of duty.

They obey because their life or work depends on it.

It is an entirely self-serving and self-interested kind of response, rather than focused on what is good for their master.

A slave is not able to see the bigger picture, merely the next step in front of them.

And a master always puts their own needs above those of their servants.

But we know the great love that God has for this world.

A self-giving, sacrificial, grace-filled love.  

As people of the resurrection, we understand the journey of redemption and new creation that God has initiated in Jesus Christ.

We find our joy and our hope in the Kingdom of God, where all people are invited to the table, where death is no more, where we are finally free from the power of sin.

So, when Jesus commands us to abide in his love and to love others in the same way…

To “unselfishly seek the best for one another,” as the Amplified Bible puts it…

we obey, we act, we do so not out of fear, but because we have claimed God’s vision and made it our own.

We love others because we have decided to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with Jesus and put the good he seeks above our own life. 

And we choose to work for the good of every person Jesus has put in our care. 

To love others in the same way he has loved us. 

How do we practice resurrection?

We love.

We love in ways that are embodied and deal with the real needs of real people.

We build relationships with people… the ones we know and the ones we don’t know yet.  

We draw close to God and let God’s grace and love fill us up.

And then we give it all away. 

We stand shoulder-to-shoulder with all of these people, knowing that our joy is found in their good. 

We don’t have to wait for heaven. 

We get to experience God’s resurrection life right here and right now.

And we do so every time we choose to love. 

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