preaching – Salvaged Faith

Where is Peter Bishop?

Posted on August 24, 2011Leave a comment

I honestly think that the closest I am ever going to come to experiencing what the disciples experienced after the crucifixion and burial of Jesus Christ is the summer hiatus of Fringe.

It is absolutely crazy that I have not yet posted on my favorite television obsession, Fringe. It is a visual feast, has some of the best acting on the small screen – nay, anywhere, and never ceases to gross me out and string me along and blow my mind every single week. Two of the main characters have played at least five versions of themselves in various universes and times… its out there, and it is fantastic.

In May, season 3 ended with one huge, gigantic cliffhanger. Seeing the result of the course of action their world was currently on, one of the main characters, Peter Bishop, made a sacrifice… to bridge the worlds, he somehow wiped himself from existence.

As fans, we sat there with our mouths hanging wide open, screaming: WHAT?! That doesn’t make sense! How can that be?! Did he die? Did he never exist? What does this mean? Is he coming back? Why would the writers do that? But we loved Peter Bishop! Joshua Jackson is awesome, how could you do this?! What on earth is going to happen now?

Theories started flying around the internet. It didn’t help that the people who were actually employed by the show as cast had no clue what was coming next either. Confusion, chaos, despair, curiousity, set in.

Some thought maybe he would reappear as an observer, but then that theory was blown out of the water when Mr. Jackson appeared at Comic-Con in observer gear, making fun of us all.

Somehow he will be back… we know the question has changed from “Who is Peter Bishop?” (as in, what are you talking about, that guy never existed) to “Where is Peter Bishop?” But that doesn’t necessarily set our minds at ease until we actually see the character reintegrated into the show. He is part of the trinity of the core cast and the relationships he has formed with the other characters, especially his father, MAKE the show what it is.

Those final two minutes of the season finale were, in a miniscule way, comparable to the final days of the disciples with Jesus. Things were going well, but were difficult. Uncertainty was in the air, but you knew you were in good hands.

And then all of a sudden, wham-bam, the whole universe falls apart.

I know that this is a stretch. But in our lifetime it is always going to be a stretch to imagine what it would have been like to be a disciple at that time. Nothing we experience can compare to the confusion and despair they must have felt to watch their teacher – their messiah – brought up on charges, beaten, and killed. Those agonizing days would have been utterly heartbreaking. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. They didn’t know what was going to happen next. And every possibility seemed impossible.

The world of entertainment tries to capitalize on those moments of uncertainty. Every single narrative arc relies upon those natural breaks in the story that leave you wanting more, that have you hanging on by the seat of your pants because you need to know what happens next. Every 23 minute comedic episode uses the commercial breaks to leave you guessing as to the punchline that inevitably awaits at the end. We all want our loose-ends tied up… but the ride is so much more fun when we have some moment of sheer panic in between.

That particular season finale: “The Day We Died” was superb. Narratively speaking, it pulled all of the right strings… or all of the wrong ones, if you want to think about it that way. It left you simply aghast and what this could possibly mean in the context of a story you wanted to immerse yourself in.

Yes, it’s television.

Yes, it is only a story.

But for someone as far removed from the crucifixion of Christ as we are today, sometimes that too, feels like little more than a story.

And as I wait in anxious anticipation for the season to start again in September… I realize that I do so with much more hope than the frightened disciples huddled together in a room.

In Fringe, the worlds will never be the same again after that ending.

For the disciples and for us, the world would never be the same, either.

I find myself at times incredibly jealous of the gifts of writers on some of these shows. They capture, week in and week out an intensity of emotion and pathos that truly brings the words and the narratives to life.

My only hope is that as a pastor, as someone who tries to live these scriptures and teach these scriptures, I might help bring to the words the same kind of intensity and longing and doubt and confusion as some of my favorite television shows do every episode.

potluck worship

Posted on March 19, 20112 Comments

A colleague of mine recently forwarded an email about potlucks and banquets. It was written by Dr. Ed Robinson, the president of MidAmerica Nazarene University in Olathe, KS.

photo by: Gözde Otman

Dr. Robinson asks us if our worshipping experiences are more like banquets or potlucks. And by that he means: do you come to worship and wait to be served, or do you bring something to the experience and try what is offered by others? (You can read the full article here)

I think it is a fascinating metaphor for both our worshipping life and our experience as the church. Is the church a place and a program that meets your needs or are you an active participant with something to contribute? Are you being served or are you serving? Are you a person in a pew or a part of the body of Christ?

I happen to love food. And I love potlucks even more. I’m not sure that you can be a good methodist withoutloving these two things! So, it’s probably obvious where I fall and where I encourage you to land in the choice between a banquet church and a potluck church.

But how do we turn our churches into potlucks? How do we encourage folks to bring something to the table? (or the sanctuary?)

First, I think we need to create opportunities in worship for folks to be active. Participation in a responsive liturgy is not enough. We need to ask people to get up, move around, think, respond, speak, and do things in worship.

This can be scary for churches that are accustomed to stand and sit worship. But what I have found is that people are hungry for the chance to be stimulated mentally, physically, and spiritually.

In my own congregation, we have interactive worship every so often. It is never something that is forced upon folks; people can stay seated if they want to. What is important is that whatever we are doing directly is related to the message for the day.

One of the first pieces of interactive worship we used related to the Lent 1 text from Genesis in cycle B. As we remembered God’s promise to Noah after the flood – we affirmed, as a congregation, that we are blessed by God. We proclaimed that God desires not the death of a sinner, but that we all repent and live. We celebrated that God promises to be, and has been, with us through the storms of our lives.

Our youth group prepared the canvases by painting them red, orange, yellow, green, blue and purple. Then, following a brief mediation on the texts, I invited people to come and paint on these canvases signs of God’s promises to us. We remembered how God has shown us grace and mercy. We wrote words of hope and life.

Those canvases still hang at the front of our sanctuary.

Second, worship needs to connect with the congregation on a deeply personal level. It is not enough to simply preach a sermon that talks about the world around us – it needs to apply to what they are daily struggling with.

I have borrowed and adapated resources from a number of different locations, but one of my favorite sites is creativeprayer.com. One Sunday for worship, we talked about the sins in our own lives and used this idea for confession with sand. All around the room we place 2 gallon buckets filled with sand and handed each person a brown paper lunch sack. As we wandered around the room, we read the questions above each bucket and if that applied to us, we put a scoop of sand in our bag. They got heavy. It was a personal journey for each of us – and yet no one could see how much we were carrying. It was between me and God.

Near the end of worship, we took those heavy bags and we laid them before the cross. It was one of the most powerful worship experiences we have had in our church, because the message hit you personally. You carried the weight of your sin to the cross and left it there. Literally.

Third, the voices of the congregation need to have a space to be heard in worship.You cannot participate if you are not allowed to speak, to sing, to respond, to question.

While we don’t do this every Sunday (and sometimes I wonder, why not!), every so often our worship takes on a form of lectio divina. We ask folks to reflect on the scriptures and to share with one another what they think. There are other days when I ask folks to respond with their own questions. Even hymn sings provide the opportunity for individuals to share their favorite music and why it is a meaningful selection from their own experience.

I have also realized that there are some people who will never speak up during church. They don’t feel comfortable in front of large groups. I have attempted at various times to engage in The Roundtable Pulpit: Where Leadership & Preaching Meet sessions where a small group of folks help me to reflect on the text for the coming week. Those questions and ideas are then woven into the sermon. It provides an opportunity for voices other than my own to be heard and included. I love the concept, I have just had a difficult time getting a diversity of people to show up for the weekly gatherings.

Just as we have fantastic cooks in our local congregations, so too do we have people who are gifted in word, song, dance, creativity, passion, experience, and dedication. Just as we celebrate the good eats that come to the table when we feast together, so too should worship be a feast to God with all people offering together.

Judicial Retention and the Trust Clause of the UMC

Posted on November 4, 20101 Comment

This week in Iowa, three Supreme Court Justices were voted out of office. And I’m a little upset about it.

A huge part of my frustration comes from the fact that they were voted out because of a homophobic reaction to one decision they made during the course of their tenures. In a unanimous ruling by the court, a law that limited marriage between a man and a woman was deemed unconstitutional. The decision itself can be read here. It is extremely well written, and worth the read. One of the first responses our bishop, Bishop Julius C. Trimble, made was that in no way does that decision impact what we do or do not have to do as clergy. We are not being forced to marry those whom our Discipline says we are not allowed to marry. But as far as the state is concerned, as far as the institution that the state is concerned with, the rights should be granted to all.

I realize that folks are of all sorts of different opinion about the issue of same-sex marriage. I respect your beliefs. I hope you will respect mine.

My frustration is with the precedent that this particular retention vote sets for the future of our judiciary. In conversations that I have had with others in the past week, I have become ever more aware of two things.

1) Folks don’t understand the role of the judicial system. There are all sorts of arguments going on saying that a court shouldn’t be making law and shouldn’t be accepting cases of such a highly volitile nature and I have even heard more than once that the courts don’t get to interpret the law – they just need to enforce it. Basic civics lesson – the courts job IS to interpret the law. It is to recieve cases, brought by the people or the state, that bring forth questions of constitutionality. Is a particular law constitutional? The congress can’t decide that, the people can’t decide that, the executive branch can’t decide that… it is the court’s role to interpret the law and hold it against the constitution to deem its worthiness. AND – they issue opinions. That is their role. Their rulings are deemed opinions because they are interpretations in particular times and places. The executive branch enforces the law, the congressional branch makes the law, but the judicial branch interprets. It always has been and always will be its role. The congressional branch is absolutely free to make amendments to the constititution that will then change what that opinion might be in the future… that’s part of the checks and balances system. Instead of being upset with the unanimous decision of the justices, the anger in this case should have been directed towards those who refused to bring an amendment to the table.

2) In a facebook conversation, someone mentioned that folks who voted “no” on retention were afraid to speak up and tell why they did so. “don’t you think the fear of being personally and politically attacked keeps people from having a civilized conversation about this subject or any other for that matter?” I responded, ” ironically, the fear of being personally and politically attacked for an unpopular opinion is exactly why that vote is so damaging to our judiciary system.” The very reason that we moved away from an elected judiciary is so that money could not buy court decisions. The very reason this vote is so troubling is that it will take balls for justices to make unpopular rulings in the future. To always be wondering who you might upset because of your decision takes the unbiased factor out of the judicial system. Now, I’m prone to be naive… but I will admit that there are flaws in the system we have. It was pointed out that each of the justices currently on the court are registered democrats… however, two of those voted out were appointed by a conservative governor. In any case, for the retention vote to be used not as a means of disposing of poor judges, but as a referrendum on one particular issue destroys the objectivity of the court.

Perhaps I am so frustrated by point number two, because I feel like there should be some protections there to enable justices to go against the flow, to rule for what is right and not what is popular, to make a stand for actual justice. I say that because I, myself, like all other pastors, regularly have to make those sorts of decisions.

The very nature of the pastorate means that we have to speak the truth – even when it is not popular. We are called upon to comfort the afflicted… but also to afflict the comfortable. We are called to speak truth to power. We are called to pull at people and challenge them to grow. We are called upon by Christ to turn the values of this world upside down and inside out. And constantly, that means that we are called upon to lift up the concerns of those who have no voice, those who have no power, those who have no hope. The bible tells us to leave our gleanings for the poor and not gather them up for ourselves. The bible tells us to be good to the foreigner in our midst. The bible tells us to forgive, to turn the other cheek, to love our enemies. To preach the gospel often means that we are speaking out on behalf of the minorities in our country. It often means saying unpopular things.

Which is why I am grateful for some protection. If a pastor depended on their popularity to maintain their pulpit – the gospel would never be preached. But in my tradition and in others as well, we have this lovely little thing called the Trust Clause…

Which means… any United Methodist Church belongs to the Church and not the people. Any pastor who serves in said church is accountable to the Church and not the people. That may be a slight oversimplification… but I hope you get the point.

In trust, that said premises shall be used, kept, and maintained as a place of divine worship of the United Methodist ministry and members of The United Methodist Church; subject to the Discipline, usage, and ministerial appointments of said Curch as from time to time authorized and declared by the General Conference and by the annual conference within whose bounds the said premises are situated. This provision is solely for the benefit of the grantee, and the grantor reserves no right or interest in said premises.

John Wesley used something called the “model deed” to protect the security of the places where the Methodists worshipped. It created a sense of conformity… in that those who preached must hold to the doctrines espoused by the church, but it also meant according to one scholor that the preaching houses, “cannot be alienated from their original intent and are not subject to the theological or ecclesiastical fancies of local leadership.”

If you preach against gambling in a community that has just recieved permission to build a new casino – you can’t be kicked out of the church. If you preach tolerance and welcoming of the sojourner in a community frustrated by an influx of migrants – you can’t be kicked out of the church. Just because something is unpopular does not mean that it is grounds for dismissal.

I think part of the reason this retention votes is so disheartening is because I empathize with those who are called sometimes to make unpopular and difficult decisions. I have watched them over the course of this campaign refuse to fight back, refuse to give in, and I have watched them and supporters of the judiciary work to educate the public.

When I am called upon to be prophetic, to speak hard things, it would be easy to argue back when others disagree… but I am inspired by the courage and respect that these three justices in particular showed.

I am lucky enough to be a part of a system that allows me to make tough decisions and I get to keep my job. My heart goes out to those not only for whom that was not the case here in Iowa, but for those across the world who take tough stands every single day and are punished for it, who are ridiculed, who are persecuted, and who die for those decisions. I am more lucky that I realize. And I pray that I might use this gift for good and not squander it.

Preaching in an Empire…

Posted on August 26, 2010Leave a comment

Today, our conference “Thursday Memo for Preachers” came across my inbox. I’m usually challenged and inspired by Rev. Bill Cotton’s words – and today was no exception.

“Be appalled, O heavens, at this, be shocked, be utterly desolate, says the Lord…”Jer. 2:12

Abraham Heschel in his classic work on the Prophets describes them as persons who become excited and agitated about matter that most of us take for granted. For example, ignoring the needs of the poor. Those old boys like Jeremiah seemed to have one less layer of skin than the rest of us, and that made then sensitive to all forms of injustice.

Have you wondered what Jeremiah would be saying to the richest nation on earth’s inability or unwillingness to see that children of the poor have access to a doctor. Each Tuesday the Grace Health Clinic discovers people without insurance- victims of this cruel system we live under. And should the church speak the words of Jeremiah regarding this injustice, some would call his words socialism and dismiss his raving. Jeremiah speaks in the text for Sunday of how the people have turned away from God, the fountain of living water, and dug cracked cisterns that can hold no water.

Our first parsonage in Fairly, Texas had a cistern. Along about August it would go dry and crack open and we would buy a load of water for $5.00, and it would be gone in a day or two unless we patched the cracks, only that didn’t work so well either. Cisterns that leak are not much good. Churches that ignore the prophets’ word are like broken cisterns.

Maybe Jeremiah is too much for the church and nation this week. If so we might try Dr. Luke’s description of Jesus telling us that when we give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame.. and you will be blessed because they cannot repay you..Luke 14:13

With all of the injustice that we face in these times, perhaps both Jeremiah and Luke are too troublesome. There simply is no place to run no place to hide from these texts this week if we are faithful to the text.

One last try. Hebrews 13:1-8,15-16 This text invites us to show hospitality to strangers and we do have an open door policy. Well the door is somewhat open. But, within that text are the words “Jesus Christ the Same, yesterday, today and forever”. Those words just feel good in the mouth. The only problem, if we practice the faith of Jesus who is always the same we must include the faith of Jeremiah. Still no place to run, no place to hide. The preaching life is tough with you live in an empire. Go preach anyway!

I was especially moved by the line – “should the church speak the words of Jeremiah regarding this injustice, some would call his words socialism and dismiss his raving.”

Our church is celebrating this Sunday the missional outreach of our congregation. I am not standing up in the pulpit to preach – but I pray that these words of Jeremiah and Hebrews and Luke will not be ignored. We will gather to celebrate the ways that we have fed the hungry, and helped those in prison, and brought healing to the sick, and reached out to the poor in this past year. And I am so proud of my church for the amazing ways that they have given for those in need.

The Christmas Giving Tree for Tanzania

But something that has profoundly stood out to me is how few of us spend time with the poor, the sick, the imprisoned. We are quick with our pocketbooks or with a food and clothing drive, but there are relatively few who are willing or able to head on over to the meal site and sit down with folks. That is probably just as much the fault of our busy schedules and prioritizing of family as it is a discomfort with being around those we think might be different.

Dan Dick wrote about our “comfort-zones” this week on his blog. And it was a reminder to me that discipleship involves growing and stretching and in some cases being disoriented so that we can be realigned with God’s priorities. We all have different gifts and places of spiritual comfort, but the fullness of the experience of God is only reached if we are able to move outside of those areas and encounter God in the unfamiliar, too.

My prayer is that the testimony of those who have served with their hands and feet might be a witness this week. My prayer is that their stories might help to nudge their fellow brothers and sisters into a more active and present love of their neighbor. These are challening times in the rhetorical world. Our nation is split on ideological lines, and my prayer is that their experience would provide a far better exposition of the challenging words for this Sunday than my preaching ever could.

the intersection of God and my remote control

Posted on July 28, 2010Leave a comment

I can’t deny that I am a fan of television. There is something about a 42 minute episode that pulls me in, wraps me its little nugget of truth, and then sets me free to think and ponder.

It is the storytelling that does it. The way the larger arc of the narrative unfolds over a season or a series, but each episode also is its own self-contained tale. It’s the conflict and the resolution of a good drama that keeps me coming back for more. Maybe I am so intrigued because I find it to be an excellent model for preaching… a consistent message that unfolds over time – yet also succinct morals and takehomes that get you by from week to week. I want to be a better storyteller in my preaching, and television is one of the main ways that we wrap ourselves up around common narratives.

During the regular season, I would sit at home in front of my television and would be connected with friends and colleagues all across the country who were enjoying the budding romance between Rachel and Finn (Glee), or who were tearing up as Sun and Jin sunk together in the submarine (Lost). The age of technology has made it possible for us to laugh and cry with people far away over twitter and facebook.

But it is not only about the creation of a shared story and narratives to enjoy. Woven into these entertaining episodes are also deep questions that we need to wrestle with. What is the nature of good and evil? What happens to us after we die? What is the relationship between science and religion? What can we truly know? Do the ends justify the means? What makes me a good person? What is faith? Where is God in medicine? How do we make difficult ethical decisions? What is family? Who is God?

Over on my other blog, I occasionally take time to write down some of the thoughts that pop into my head after a television show – but that isn’t the sole purpose of “salvaged faith.” So, I needed a new space to gab about those horrific and awe inspiring moments that catch me off guard from time to time. I needed a new space to really spend some serious time reflecting on the images of God and of humanity that we find on television… a space to navigate with others these entertaining, enlightening, and challenging stories. Let’s turn the dial… and begin!

chaotic peace

Posted on July 6, 20102 Comments

The other day, B strongly encouraged me to organize my pocketbook. It seemed like such a silly thing at the time, but there it was, busting at the seams with reciepts and cash sticking out and no hope of ever closing. He said – if you can get that thing to close right, maybe there is hope for you after all. And I did! =) All I had to do was take the checkbook out, put the cash in the right spot, and tuck my recipets in the pocket where the extremely seldom used checkbook had been.

I think my husband would describe me as a person who thrives on chaos. What he would mean by that is that I kind of let things go and forget about them and let everything hang out flapping about until a kind of critical point is reached. And then I jump into this frenzy of action and wham bam boozle – somehow, things kind of work out.

“Kind of” is the operative part of the phrase there.

It is true that for much of my life, that is how I have viewed the world. I’ll put something off until the absolute last possible moment. I hate confronting conflict or unpleasant tasks. I ignore things until I have to face them. And while I have, for the most part, been successful in this way of doing things, it is not my best. And it doesn’t work for everyone.

This last week, I preached on peace. And as is sometimes the case as a pastor, I felt like I was preaching to myself. Because peaceful is often the last thing that I feel in this chaotic way that I operate. Peaceful is not the word to describe the way relationships sometimes turn out due to this way of operating. Peaceful is not the word to describe the garden space on the south side of my house. Peaceful is not the proper adjective for newsletter creating, or bulletin producing, or sermon writing… at least not in my life.

As I spent some time wrestling with peace this week, I was reminded of the hebrew idea of shalom. Shalom is more than peace – it is right relationship, right order, wholeness and harmony. And not in some fuzzy, hippie, feel good sense. You know how you look around and see that things are just out of whack? when you can’t figure out how to make things fit or you know in your gut that something is off… that is the lack of shalom. And an article by Bruce Birch caught my attention when he wrote that the opposite of shalom is chaos.

You see, as much as I thrive on this chaos… as much as I am comfortable with the way that I operate… that doesn’t mean it is good for me. The peace that I obtain as I work this way, as I play this way, as I love this way is not full. It is partial and it is grasping. But to open myself up to right priorities… to find balance in my life… to seek out order and a proper time for things… to allow God to guide me… to let go of some things and delegate others… maybe that could bring shalom. Maybe letting go of my comfortable chaos might help me to truly find the peace that passes all understanding.

How I end up finding this order in my life is a different question. It’s not enough to just pray about it. I am firmly of the belief that prayer also requires action on our behalf. I’ve already organized my pocketbook, so at least I’m starting somewhere. I consolidated all of my google calendars so that all of my appointments show up at the same time on my blackberry. But just ready to come to the surface is the realization that the way I do church has to radically change. I need to hand some things off. I need to let go and find people to take over a few things that may have been the pastor’s job in the past… like doing the newsletter… so that I can be freed up to do the things I am called to do. As much as I enjoy them. As much as I am comfortable doing them. They create chaos as I try to stuff everything in and clasp the darn thing shut. And letting it go might be the answer I’m looking for.

outline preaching

Posted on April 13, 20101 Comment

Some weeks are hard for preaching. I usually am able to take the time to get into the texts and to prayerfully discuss them with colleagues and to stew over the gospel message as I do the things that it takes to be the church… and other things as well.

But some weeks, there is too much to do to take the time to write a manuscript. I lose hours of sleep on Saturday evening and Sunday morning painstakingly typing out the right words to say. I have always been a manuscript preacher and it takes so much more time… on the front end at least.

This last week, I had no time to write. I had thought and thought and thought… but there was no time to sit at my computer and write. I sat through deep theological conversations on death and life and the new creation (which was my sermon topic)… but there was no time to sit and write. I wrestled with what God was calling me to preach… but there was no time to sit and write. I spent time with friends I haven’t seen in a year… and there was no time to write.

Sunday morning at 6:15, I got up and took some of the jumbled thoughts that had filled my life for a full seven days and jotted them down. I put the stories in order. I found the natural flow of the message. I connected the gospel to the epistle in a quick comparison and contrast. I knew where I wanted to get and I trusted God would get it there. (or, rather, I thought I knew where God wanted us all to get and I prayed God would send the Spirit) And I let it be.

I think that Sunday morning – even with only 4 hours of sleep – was a good morning for preaching. Thanks be to God the Spirit showed up. Thanks be to God that I had the courage to step away from the pulpit to tell a story for only the second time since I’ve been here. Thanks be to God that I didn’t have it all written out and that the message flowed through me. Thanks be to God.

Why the Revised Common Lectionary is the perfect model for Emergent Church

Posted on January 27, 20104 Comments

Random thought came to me tonight. How it came to me is the subject of my next blog…. but in any case.

Every week, people all across the world use the exact same texts to tell the stories of scripture. We start with the exact same thing. And then we take those few words, those phrases, those verses and we transform them into “emergent” sermons.

As pastors, we borrow and we beg. We look at what others have done successfully. We rely upon the expertise of others. But then, when Saturday night comes (yes, I’m a saturday night writer) – it’s just me and my laptop and the concerns and hearts of my congregation that I’m thinking about. So we take all of the wisdom and advice that’s out there and we adapt and we mold and we shape and we transform what is in reality a very structured institutional thing like the revised common lectionary and we create very different, very contextual, very powerful messages for our local congregations.

That’s what we do with emerging church. we take the core of the Christian faith and the way of discipleship and we beg and borrow and wrestle and share with others – but at the end of the day it’s about how we live all of that out in our local contexts. It’s about how it makes sense for the people we work with on a day to day basis.

Just a thought.

If anyone has had it before – I would love to read more and discuss it. If you want to borrow it – with it’s short, blinding light of brilliance – just let me know =P