elder's orders – Salvaged Faith

Was John Wesley a Deacon?

Posted on July 1, 20113 Comments

Through John Meunier, I was directed to “Four John Wesley quotes everyone should know” by John Pedlar.

They are good quotes, and ones that, as a student of Methodist history and theology, I knew well.

But as John shares, James shares an important insight at the end of his piece. It is in response to Wesley’s quote “the world is my parish.”

Wesley’s quote about the world being his parish is usually seen as his missional justification for preaching the gospel wherever he was. But he also knew that he was exempt from the parish boundary rules as a fellow of Lincoln College, Oxford. He had no parish of his own, and was free to preach where he liked

I think for me, that quote from James Pedlar asks the question – are we hindered in our ability to preach the gospel where it needs to be preached BECAUSE of our parish/appointment?

In the context of Wesley’s ministry, territory was everything. Your parish was a geographical location and your people where those within its borders. I think he’s right that John was free from that because of his academic placement.

So, what would that look like today? Would it be more appropriate to think of John Wesley in today’s terms as a deacon? As a pastor without an appointment?

The more I think about it, the more I think Wesley would have been a 21st century United Methodist Deacon rather than anything else. As far as I can tell, he did not regularly administer the sacraments… he encouraged people to go to their local parish congregation and recieve them there. He was an academic and a preacher, a writer and a teacher, an organizer… and I have a feeling that he would have been very unhappy under the appointment system.

In our world, our “parish” or our congregation can be limiting if we let it. If we stick within the walls of our church and only preach to those who come to us, the gospel is confined. Sometimes this isn’t intentional. Sometimes the demands of newsletters and repairing the roof and worship planning just gets in the way of our ability to be in the world preaching the gospel.

If we were not limited to one congregation – or even two or three or five (in some yoked parishes) – how would the job of ministry change? If the parish were not your primary appointment, but you were still an ordained elder with sacramental responsibility, what would your days look like? The first place I see being thrown out the window is pastoral care, but perhaps that is not fair…

That being said… sometimes Elders under appointment self-limit themselves. As my bishop reminded a group of young clergy, we are appointed to communities, not to congregations. The world of ministry around us is far bigger than we sometimes assume. There are plenty of opportunities to serve outside of our local church communities, also.

The question for me is always one of calling… what are you called to be and to do?

Wesley was called to use his post as a vehicle for transformation of his church and of disciples of Jesus Christ. He had some freedom to move and travel to enable him to do that.

I am called to deeply inhabit this community to share the love of God with them in every way that I can. I have some freedom and authority because of my position to do that as well.

Thank God that there are many ways that we can serve!

parsonage inspection

Posted on June 30, 20111 Comment

I am not a housekeeper.

I never have been.

I didn’t learn how to growing up.

I don’t have time to now.

I can do the basics like vacuuming and dusting and countertops and windows.

But to make it a daily/weekly habit is something far beyond my grasp.

It’s not just that I do not have a set routine for doing it… it is that my very being doesn’t work that way =)

So things like parsonage inspections get me all whipped up in a tizzy.

There are very good reasons for having these sorts of things. It is an opportunity for the people who actually own the house to come out and make sure that their property is being taken care of. It is an opportunity to figure out what needs general maintenence and repair (like our roof currently does). It is an opportunity for my husband and I as the residents to point out things that need some attention by physically showing what the problem is.

But at times, it feels like another opportunity for the pastor to be in the fishbowl with all eyes upon me.

I hope that people don’t take it as an opportunity to check out all of our hand me down college furniture.

I hope that people don’t take it as an opportunity to point out all of the yard work that needs to be done (when during VBS week and following a weekend with a wedding am I supposed to find time to weed?)

And what I sincerly hope it is not is an opportunity to critique my housekeeping skills.

You see, I have big dreams. Some day when I pay off my student loans, I’m putting that money towards a montly deep cleaning by a professional.

But today? My husband and I both work. We both have loans. We both enjoy doing things besides housework like disc golf and computers and movies.

We do the best we can for right now with what we’ve got.

The floor doesn’t shine, but it has been swept and swiffered.

The windows haven’t been cleaned inside and out, but a few of them were done properly.

The carpets were vacuumed… although those high traffic areas always look a little dingy no matter how many times we go over them.

In fact… thinking of those high traffic areas got me thinking about the changes I would make to the parsonage if it were my actual house.

I’ve started compiling them as suggestions if changes are ever made and they need input from someone who has actually lived in the space:

Do NOT carpet the bathroom. Our master bath currently has carpet and with the humidity it always seems a little dingy. Bad idea.
Do NOT carpet entryways. The lower level of our house has an entrance from the garage and one that goes to the backyard. No matter the placement of doormats, these are high traffic areas that get a lot of action from shoes that have been outside. I would suggest that at the very least the garage entry way be tile/wood… something easy to sweep and mop so all that dirt doesn’t dig down into the carpet.
update countertops with something that will not soak in stains. Kool-aid and off white laminate countertops make pink countertops. The Mr. Clean Magic Eraser does wonders, but it also kind of takes the finish off. We don’t need granite… but if you have people in a home with children (or messy cooks) something durable and easy to clean is best.

For now, I’m hoping for one part grace, two parts blind eyes, and three measures of hard work to get the needed repairs done. =)

the world is my parish

Posted on February 28, 2011Leave a comment

Bishop Trimble recently reminded a group of young clergy that we are not appointed to congregations… we are appointed to communities.

It was something I had not really considered before he made that statement… and it was a refreshing thought.

In many ways, I had assumed that my ministry was both in my church and in the community that surrounds it. That’s kind of the way my missionally-minded brain works.

But since he spoke them out loud, I have really taken his words to heart and have felt emboldened in the work I do “out there.”

If I’m honest, it might be one of my favorite parts of my job.

Way back when… okay, only three or four years ago… wait… holy crap… seven or eight years ago!… I thought I was called to be a deacon. I felt that my ministry was as much about being out in the world as it ever was to be in a congregation. I heard God calling me to be a bridge between the church and the world. And that is the essence of what I understood the ministry of a deacon to be.

But then this little whisper started to tug at my soul. It was the sacraments. The bread and the wine and the water kept speaking to me. And then they took hold. My ministry might include the world… but God was also calling me to use the church as the vehicle of my ministry. God was calling me to break bread as much as he was calling me to break barriers.

Long story short… my journey has come full circle. I am now an ordained elder with sacramental authority AND I get to work in my community. God had a plan long before I could ever see it or understand it.

I’ve blogged before about my outreach and relationship building through funerals and weddings in the larger community. I have been the main organizer around the community worship in the park for the last two years – an amazing opportunity to share in worship with one another AND to share in the one loaf and the one cup.

What I have not done as well in my first three years of ministry was to get involved actively transforming the community. But this year, my work with youth got to me. I realized I had to go deeper to help them. And somehow I’m now on a school improvement advisory committee and hosting an ongoing conversation about how the community can better support and encourage our youth.

This work is so completely different from what I do on a day to day basis in the church. Much of that difference has to do with having the authority of a pastor.

My ministry in my congregation is ministry “with” not ministry “for.” I am not someone who throws around my weight… instead I see my role as empowering my people to do ministry themselves. I would rather work alongside my parishoners than lead them.

But in the community, the role of the pastor takes on a different flavor. As one youth parent said a couple of weeks ago, “When I go to the school office and talk about a problem, it’s more of the same. When Pastor Katie says something, they listen.”

To be honest, that authority scares me a little. But it is also exciting. God has put me in a place where I can speak on behalf of these parents and I have a powerful voice. God has put me in a place where I can make connections between people and provide a literal space for those new relationships. God has put me in a place where I have a real and tangible ability to make a difference.

Tonight, our little community group met again. And while the start of this journey is small and the momentum is slow, I can already sense the possibilities. I am energized by the true and living hope that God is doing something in Marengo. And I pray with thanksgiving that I get to be a part of that work.

jaded?

Posted on January 13, 20114 Comments

At a clergy event on Monday, a colleague of mine and I sat near the back. We are very good listeners… but sometimes a little snarky. Sitting that far back, we can pass comments quietly to one another without disturbing everyone else =) Really, we are trying to be good participants!

In both that event and in a few subsequent gatherings with clergy, from a variety of places, I have found myself this week very aware that there are some jaded folks in our midst.

Image by: Przemyslaw Szczepanski

They are isolated from their congregations theologically and spiritually. They are hurt from past successes no one took notice of. They feel called to do something, but don’t see any support structure to guide them. They have had times of failure and are afraid to try again.

I bet almost every single pastor that I encountered this week could write part of that story. And to be sure, some have very positive responses to these experiences and have moved on. Some just have these jaded days once in a blue moon. But I think so many have had them, that I’m sensing it has led to a frustration and lack of trust and community among the larger body.

As a young adult, we see what is going on and we are doing EVERYTHING we can to prevent ourselves from getting there. We are building networks of support amongst ourselves – cell groups that develop geographically, but are not silos… we welcome folks in and out as we pass through one anothers ministry. We sit with older clergy and welcome them into our midst as we share with one another the strengths and trials of our ministries. We take time to vent and to grieve and to celebrate. And we are trying to advocate for one another.

There is certainly a lot that can still be done to continue to build this network. We are trying to connect with those going through the ordination process to offer support, but we have met a few road blocks. Our semi-annual retreats don’t always get off the ground (ice storm, anyone?!). And we are still seeking more ways to deepen the connections we share. And sometimes we are a little cliquish… we could do a better job of expanding our horizons and stepping out of our own comfort zones more often. When we do, it is often through our colleagues/RIM group/Sub-District, rather than diving into relationships with folks we have never met. Might I also add that we are naive and hopeful bunch?

Hope is not a foolish thing, however.

And even if it is, aren’t we called to be fools for the sake of Christ?

What I most hope today is that our snarky little attitudes never become jaded. That we can have fun with one another and question without feeling threatened. That the trust we are building amongst ourselves truly will bring life to the dry bones and transform the clergy of future generations… with God’s help.

it causes me to tremble…

Posted on June 6, 2010Leave a comment

Day two of our annual conference has completed. We have voted on exactly 7 items of legislation. And we have celebrated and praised and prayed and remembered and sung and danced and ate and hugged and sat and walked and listened.

Some brief highlights for me so far:

“Hi, I’m Fred.” Our “priest” for the conference introduced himself and welcomed us into a spirit of worshipful work and I truly have felt this particular time of conference has felt different because of it.
advocating for young adults at our legislative section and dreaming up possibilities for community college ministries
Rev. Doug Ruffle’s challenges to be a sign, a foretaste, and an instrument of the Kingdom of God…
crazy fast and delicious dinner at A Dong
even though clergy session was inhumanely long – it had a wonderful spirit to it as we gathered to worship (thanks clergy band!) and celebrate the ministry we share… and have good conversation about itinerancy
ordination!!!!!! being surrounded by family and church members and friends, the weight of all of those hands upon me, the feeling of the bible underneath my fingers, singing with joy
the reminders throughout the day of the gift of the scriptures: Bishop Kulah talking about Jesus expounding the scriptures; Barbara Lundblad’s take on radical love enfleshed in John’s gospel (love that bends down, that reaches beyond, that puts people before rules, that is here in this moment, that renews itself as soon as you think it has ended); Bishop Job sharing what a day, a year, a decade’s worth of living in the word can do for our lives; a friend’s amazing rendition of a song from the musical Philemon during prayer;
the Rethink Rock video
the voices of young adults who stood to speak out of love for what they care about on the floor.
sharing deeply with one another truths about things that have hurt us… so that we might give them over to God.
our conference artist’s work… and the poetic description of what God is sharing with us through it. The idea of being baptised into the suffering, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ being symbolized by a font filled with shards of glass… of chairs of hospitality inviting us to take our seat… the challenge that being radically hospitible brings… of the chair on the cross being an invocation – asking for God to enter our lives.

Vocations?

Posted on June 3, 20102 Comments

Today at our county ministerial alliance we talked about the multiple vocations that people have in their lives. The conversation sprang from a book we are reading together and a scene in which a Catholic priest approaches his bishop to let him know that he has fallen in love. The priest both feels called to the ministry and called to love and marry this woman that he has met.

Good old Wikipedia shares that vocation is: an occupation to which a person is specially drawn or for which they are suited, trained or qualified. While being a wife wouldn’t always be considered an occupation… it is work. And parenthood falls under the same consideration. As do our hobbies and livlihoods. And potentially our jobs. As we talked, we became more and more aware of the multiple vocations that have an influence on our lives.

In my own life, I am called to my husband, to my family, I am called to ministry as an elder in the UMC, and I’m sure that there are many others. In seminary I wrote often about a deep calling to rootedness… part of which comes from being a Midwesterner and the daughter of a farmer. It is a calling that I am currently living out both by attempting to build deep relationships in my community and with gardening.

The problem comes however, when these various callings that God has placed within our lives don’t always neatly fit together. The conflicts can be painful. How do we divide up our time and our resources and our energy? What takes priority on what days? These is a complex dance that is stepped between these obligations and loves. Not always do we make the right choices and not always is there a “right choice” to make.

Recently, the juggling has been more difficult in my life. And try as I may to give myself fully to my husband and my church work and return the phone calls of my parents and tend to those pesky weeds sprouting up in the garden, there are also the distractions that somehow sneak in and ruin the delicate balance that we create. I spent far too much time this past week reading Grey’s Anatomy fanfiction. No lie. It’s embarassing really. And over the weekend, as I prepare for Annual Conference, I’m struggling with how I can possibly spend time with the family who are coming into town, while at the same time I have obligations for rehearsals and plenary sessions. I struggle to balance how long I stay after church on a Sunday and heading out to the river to be with my in-laws and my neice and nephews. I struggle with what to do on my Fridays off with my husband when a special meeting is called in Des Moines. I struggle with finding time to get the sermon written when a funeral comes up and find myself taking time away from sleep to get it accomplished. The pull between these vocations is intense!

As I sat down to think about this idea of multiple vocations, my mind drifts to the saints who have walked before us. What biblical characters struggled with these demands? Which founders of our faith successfully navigated these waters? My mind draws blanks. I think about the ones who didn’t…. Paul’s urging of those who were unmarried to stay that way. John Wesley’s failed relationships. Even Moses left his wife and children with his father-in-law, Jethro, for a time (Exodus 18)… and I’m not sure that when they came back they came back to stay. I’m hoping others can point me to some better role models!

Modern brain science has taught us that we really cannot do more than one thing at a time. When we believe we are multi-tasking, we are really just switching incredibly quickly between one task and another, giving each full attention… even if just for micro-seconds. But it leaves us fragmented and tired, even though our brains are quickly adapting and getting better at this dance.

What are we to do? What is the right balance? And if it comes down to it, what will be our first priority?

I’m being ordained!!!

Posted on May 4, 20103 Comments

For two and a half years, I have been serving a congregation faithfully as a provisional elder in the United Methodist Church. And on June 6, I will be ordained at our Iowa Annual Conference and I will become an elder in full connection.

This whole process started back in 2002, when I was a junior in college. The process is fairly long, with a lot of hoops to jump through, but each one of them are designed to help provide me and other candidates with encouragement and to help us to clarify our calling.

When I began the process, for example, I felt I was being called to ministry as an ordained deacon. Deacons are focused more on servant ministry and while sometimes they are found in churches (as Christian Educators or Music Ministers), they are often found in places other than the church. They can be teachers or doctors or nurses or lawyers or therapists – their calling is to connect the church with the world.

So I went through the “red book” and was assigned a mentor. And together we sorted our way through the “blue book” – a spiral bound monster of a book that talks about biblical history, asks you to examine your family and your culture.. When I completed that study I became an inquiring candidate for ministry.

Then came the “purple book.” My mentor and I continued to discern and refine my calling and I knew that seminary was in my future. So I became a certified candidate for ministry, approved by the Pastor-Parish Relations committee of my home church, and headed off to Nashville in 2004.

For those who want to be ordained, a masters degree in divinity (or theological studies for deacons) is a requirement. At Vanderbilt Divinity School, I still planned on becoming a deacon and was trying to figure out what that might look like. But my experiences serving a church and especially participating in the sacraments led me to realize that my true calling was to be ordained as an elder.

The next step in the process was to be commissioned. I submitted a written exam, a bible study that I had prepared and video taped sermons that I had presented in Nashville. And then I had an interview with a team from the Board of Ordained Ministry here in Iowa. In 2007, I was commissioned as a provisional elder in the United Methodist Church and when I graduated that December from seminary, I came here to Marengo!

According to our Discipline, I must be in residency for at least two years before I can be fully ordained as an elder. So that is what these past two and a half years have been for me. I have learned so much from you and I couldn’t have asked for a better placement. This past December I submitted again a written exam and examples of my preaching and teaching (which totaled 40 pages!) and on April 8th I was approved for ordination.

So what comes next? What changes now that I am being ordained?

Nothing! Absolutely nothing. God willing, I will remain serving my church in the same capacity that I have been. There are a few things that I will get to do, like serving the sacraments outside of my congregational context, but for the most part, I will continue doing what I have been all along.

And I am so excited to jump through that last hoop =)

Goodbye Ordination Papers!!!

Posted on January 9, 2010Leave a comment

The past few weeks, really two months, I have been working here and there and everywhere on my ordination papers. And they are finally finished and in the mail system. And it feels like a huge load off of my life.

As I thought about all the work that went into them, all the ways that I have grown and changed in the past three years, I realized that if all of that work is not only for the five people who will read it for my BoOM interview. It is who I am, and how I go about ministry. So I might as well share.

In the next days/weeks, I will be posting some of my answers to the many questions out of the Book of Discipline that we have to answer. Feel free to comment back, challenge me, agree with me, and keep wrestling. Enjoy!