flesh – Salvaged Faith

Comfortable In Our Skin

Posted on February 5, 2020Leave a comment

My gym regularly has challenges that help us to stay motivated and accountable with one another and our goals. For almost three years, Elite Edge has pushed me and shaped me and it is an important part of my week and how I care for myself.

But I have to admit that I have this internal struggle going on with one of the key reasons I go and show up and put all sorts of limits on what I eat in order to accomplish the goals I set there:

I don’t always feel comfortable in my body.

I actually remember why I signed up in the first place. I had looked at this image of myself in a conference news story and it was rounder than I remembered it being. A lot rounder. To be honest, I hadn’t stepped on a scale in a while. I was filling my life with work and family and wasn’t doing much to take care of myself in healthy ways.

There are two parts of this realization that are important. My relationship with my body was virtually non-existent. I just wasn’t paying attention to it. And from a health perspective, that’s not a great thing. I was experiencing a few symptoms of dis-ease that I was ignoring but that photo of myself caused me to ask some questions of my doctor. I want to be strong and healthy and full of life as I age and this was a moment to change the story I was writing for myself. And I did.

But it also stirred up all sorts of anxiety about how I should look. What other people thought about how I looked. What I thought it meant to be young and sexy. How society portrays what a fit body looks. And success at this gym was predicated around lowering our weight and losing inches, which wraps itself all into those expectations of body image that we should be smaller, thinner, more like the images we see in the media.

There are a hundred layers of this that could each be pulled back: double standards, the objectification of women’s bodies, class and racial expectations of beauty, consent and sexual violence… and they all gravitate around a harsh reality. We do not allow people to feel safe and comfortable in their own bodies. We do not respect one another’s bodies.

These over-sexualized expectations and fat-shaming perspectives are all around us. They dominate our advertising. They feed our economy as they are used to drive our consumer desire to buy products that will help us achieve these goals. And I buy into them sometimes. It’s honestly the thing that got me to stop into the gym that morning. I was willing to try something new, to spend my money, to buy into this crazy idea that I could lose twenty pounds in six weeks… because I didn’t like what my body said about who I was.

Now, having been to this gym for a few years, I have a completely different relationship with my body.

I know how strong it is.

I have walked people of all different bodies and sizes and shapes walk into that gym and we all give that session our all and leave equally sweaty and gross and energized.

I know that I do five straight minutes of jumping jacks and know every single muscle that goes into one… because those muscles hurt for nearly a week after.

I wear skinny jeans now. And I never felt comfortable in them before because they accentuated how large my thighs were, but now, I daily wear form-fitting leggings to the gym and there are huge muscles there and I don’t hide them or cover them up and no one cares or judges. And having that space where I could stop worrying about what someone else things freed me up to stop worrying in other places too.

I notice how different foods and drinks impact how I feel in a given day. Which give me energy and which leave me feeling tired and bloated.

Because I’m more comfortable in my own skin, I’m also more comfortable in my own sexuality and that part of my relationship with my spouse has grown as we actually talk about how what we are doing makes us feel and I have let go of shame or embarrassment about how I think I look.

And in all of these three years, I’ve been a variety of different sizes. I take breaks from healthy eating. I have seasons where I push harder at the gym and where I give myself a rest. I try to focus more on what is leading to my overall health, rather than getting too wrapped up in what the scale says.

And yet… there is this part of me that still cares.

Still cares about wanting to look a certain way.

Still is uncomfortable when the scale reads over a certain number.

Still worries about the curves and love handles.

This winter, instead of a numbers based challenge, my gym is focusing on non-scale victories and so we each set three goals. And one of those primary goals for me is to get to a point where I am more comfortable in my own skin.

Where I don’t just pay attention to my body, but I love it.

I embrace it no matter what the scale says.

I respect it by taking care of it to the best of my ability.

I cherish it by holding to good boundaries between myself and others, protecting it from the actions or words that could harm it.

I celebrate it openly in the world instead of feeling shame or guilt.

I’m not there yet… but I’m working on it.

This past weekend with the Super Bowl, much has been said about Shakira and J.Lo but I have to say the very first thought I had was: look at how their bodies can move!

Here are two women, older than I am, who just shared with us a celebration of who they are with every cell of their bodies.

I saw the incredible strength it took to climb and maneuver a body on a pole. (and honestly, I thought Cirque du Soleil before someone mentioned a “stripper pole”)

I saw the sweat and hard work of incredible footwork.

I saw curves and sparkle and life and energy.

I saw a full-throated embrace of a cultural reality that is not my own through words and music and images and bodies.

I saw two women who were absolutely comfortable in their own skin… who trusted their bodies and their identity and celebrated it in front of the world.

Maybe if the first thing we see is sex, it’s because we aren’t comfortable with bodies. We aren’t comfortable with our own… or with other people’s.

Maybe it’s because we have already bought into the belief that every body is an object, rather that belonging to a person with a story and feelings that come in flesh and blood. We have no respect for the bodies of others – especially those who look or sound or think differently than us.

What if we were comfortable enough in our own skin that we could allow others to fully celebrate and be comfortable in their own without judgment or revulsion or drooling?

What if we allowed the bodies of others to teach us, inspire us, push us, free us from our own limitations?

What if we created space for all bodies, for everybody, to be celebrated and cherished, embraced and respected?

An Altogether Hope

Posted on December 1, 2019Leave a comment

Text: 1 Peter 1: 3-6, 9-15,22

Keep awake! Get ready! Prepare yourselves!
These are the words that fly at us from the scriptures for this first Sunday of Advent.
But get ready for what?
Get yourself ready for the future that God has already prepared for you.
Get ready to embrace the life that Christ is calling you to embrace.
Don’t just go through the motions of basic goodness, basic practices, and basic sincerity…
Prepare yourself to truly and fully live your life for the Kingdom of God.

Over these weeks of Advent, we are going to be exploring John Wesley’s sermon, “Almost Christian,” where he invites us to hold our lives up against the picture of all that God is inviting us to be and become.
Are we there yet?
Are we doing it perfectly?
Of course not.
But if we never take the time to check in and evaluate our lives, we will never do what it takes to take the next step.
So this year, as we get ready for Christmas, we are also getting ready and preparing to receive Christ even more fully into our hearts and our lives.
This year, we will look at what it might take the get ourselves ready to become Altogether Christians, who wholeheartedly trust God and put that trust into action.
Will you pray with me?

How many of you have ever had a bad day? What about a bad week? Or a whole year?
Life is downright tough sometimes. It is unfair. It is cruel.
We finally find the job we have been searching for, and then our spouse gets laid off.
A misunderstanding destroys a friendship.
Natural disasters wipe homes off the map.
Children go hungry.
And sometimes in the midst of all of the problems this world endures we might start to ask a question that my colleague, Sarah Bessey, asked: “How could we possibly enter into Advent if we are paying attention to this world?”
She goes on to say:
“When, in response to every crisis, our communities seem splintered and divided even in how to bind up each other’s wounds and careless words are flung like rocks at our own glass houses? When perhaps we are lonely or bored or tired or sick or broke or afraid? When we are grieving and sad?
In these days, celebration can seem callous and uncaring, if not outright impossible.
But here’s the thing: we enter into Advent precisely because we are paying attention.
It’s because everything hurts that we prepare for Advent…
We don’t get to have hope without having grief. Hope dares to admit that not everything is as it should be, and so if we want to be hopeful, first we have to grieve. First we have to see that something is broken and there is a reason for why we need hope to begin with.
Advent matters, because it’s our way of keeping our eyes and our hearts and our arms all wide open even in the midst of our grief and longing.” (https://sarahbessey.substack.com/p/does-advent-even-matter-when-the)

When I think back on the tough times that I have been through in my life…
as I have listened to folks share their own stories…
what often transforms the despair of grief into the dawning of hope is that we stop being mad and angry and frustrated and we start living into the reality that we believe is possible.
It seems contrite to say that there are two ways of looking at world – either as a glass half-full or a glass half-empty… but maybe it really is as simple as that.
Either the world is a place of darkness or it is a place where the light of God dwells…
Either God has abandoned us or God is working out a plan of salvation…
Either Christ’s work is done or soon and very soon the Son of Man is coming…
Can you hear the difference in those statements?
Are we going to live as a people of hope?
Or are we going to let the grief and frustration overcome us?
That is our choice.
That is why the prophets and the apostles cry out – Keep Awake! Get Ready! Prepare Yourselves!

Hope itself can seem naïve when the world around us is falling apart.
But I turn to scriptures like the one we have read today from 1 Peter, because they remind me that the trials we are experiencing are nothing new.
In the midst of persecution, Peter wrote to early Jewish and Gentile Christians with advice about “how to survive in the midst of a hostile world” (The Rev. Sharon Ann Alexander – CEB Women’s Bible Commentary)
In the midst of their suffering, they are not promised that everything will be better, but they are invited to be born into a living hope.
This hope is not a pie in the sky wish.
It is a hope grounded in the reality that the one we put our faith and trust in has already overcome the reality of execution and death.
And we do not embrace this hope haphazardly.
We place our hope on Christ with minds that are fully sober and thinking clearly.
Or as the Message translation puts it: “Roll up your sleeves, put your mind in gear, be totally ready to receive the gift that is coming when Jesus arrives.”

And we do that by embracing God’s will, God’s holiness, God’s truth in everything we do.
We do that by putting our faith and trust and hope into action.

The first step, Peter reminds us is to stop living in grief, despair, and the patterns of our lives before Christ.
We need to let go off everything that bogs us down and drains us.
Or as the Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 13: we can’t afford to waste a minute, we must not squander these precious hours of daylight in frivolity and indulgence, in sleeping around, in bickering and grabbing everything in sight. Get out of bed and get dressed!
Think about one thing that you can do differently this Advent season as you prepare for Christmas.
What is something that you can do that will renew your hope and your faith… instead of depleting your energy and your faith?
In our Advent study, “Altogether Christmas,” Ingrid McIntyre reminds us of the difference between almost hope and altogether hope.
“One stands at a distance while the other relentlessly pursues; one offers platitudes while the other dives deep into the hopelessness of a situation and offers light in the darkness – light that grows and grows and grows.” (p. 42)
Instead of spending hours shopping for perfect present, could you go to someone who is struggling and spend that time with them, offering hope and light into their life?

The next step is to keep God in the center of all we do.
Sometimes, in our frustrating times, in the days that seem without hope, we turn our backs on God.
We look for salvation in all the wrong places.
We look for things that will make us feel better, self-medicating with alcohol or shopping sprees or social media.
We turn towards the darkness and yell at it for being so dark.
And we continue to feel alone, and empty, and lost.
But instead, when we reconnect with the very one who gave us new birth as a living hope… when we love and trust and believe and rejoice in this God even on the tough days… then the very same power that raised Christ from the dead fills up our lives and gives us the strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
So find some time this Advent to spend in devotion and prayer. Take some time to reflect on those questions from the sermon “Almost Christian.” Let the Spirit of Christ fill your heart.

Finally, we need to embrace the truth that hope is not just a sentiment, but an action we are called to embrace with every fiber of our being.
In her article, Sarah Bessey writes that “Advent holds the truth of what is right now up to the truth of what was and what will be.”
As our Advent study, “Almost Christmas,” reminds us:
“John Wesley saw and experienced the same society problems as others, but instead of accepting them, he raised hell about them so that just maybe a few neglected others could experience hope… the Church of England wasn’t living up to the church Wesley saw described in the scriptures. [so] Wesley became prophetic hope for the church.”
“Hope came when a group of people were unwilling to stay silent, who weren’t afraid to stand up and say, ‘We just can’t do this anymore.’… “Instead of just saying the words, ‘thy kingdom come,’ Wesley let God embody the hope of those words through his flesh.” (p50-51)
This Advent, find ways to let the hope of God come alive in your flesh.
Sponsor a family for Christmas.
Speak out against immigration policies that are hurting families.
March for the climate crisis.
Visit our homeless neighbors.
Fill the food pantry with donations…
Whatever it is that is breaking your heart… whatever it is that you are grieving… find a way to hold it up to the truth of what God desires for that situation and get ready to do something about it.
Make hope real with your arms and legs and feet.
Then, maybe God’s altogether hope will be born into this world once again.

Spirit of Embodiment

Posted on September 3, 2017Leave a comment

Last week I talked a little bit about how I am trying to be more healthy and strong and one of the ways I am doing that is by going to the gym.
I’m there four-five days a week and each time, while the majority of the exercises we all share together, there are a few movements where you can choose which equipment you use based on your level of experience and comfort.
This past week at the gym I moved from the beginner to the more advanced movements in our exercises. And, whew, I can feel it.
My back is still a bit stiff, my shoulders ache… My dad keeps telling me that I shouldn’t get old because this kind of soreness will just keep coming, but unfortunately that’s just a natural process I’m pretty sure I don’t have the power to stop.

Many of you have joined in prayers for my dad in the past couple of weeks. He is someone who works incredibly hard… always has… but who hasn’t always taken the time to stop and take care of his body. He gets so focused on the work that is before him and us Ziskovskys also have been known to have a bit of stubbornness when it comes to our diets.
He developed a sore on his big toe, which became a deeper infection, which eventually led to an amputation of that digit. He is recovering very well – body, mind, and spirit.

You know, sometimes we think of our bodies as just the physical container that holds the real “us.” We imagine that our lives will continue without the burden of flesh someday – either through technology or computers or floating around in heavenly places.

But the scripture constantly reminds us that our bodies are incredibly important.
They are an integral part of who God created us to be.
Our flesh and blood are not earthly things that we have to shed before we get to heaven… according to scripture – these bodies go with us – in one form or another.

Some of our sloppy thinking around bodies comes from a misunderstanding of the writings of Paul. In Romans 8:5-6, we read:

For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.

Our modern ears known what flesh is… our skin and bones… those things that ache and touch and feel and move around.
We know what our spirit is… our souls, minds, that of God which dwells within us.
So, bodies must be bad and spirit must be good.

Except, the word that gets translated “flesh”… sarx… has more than one meaning. It can mean our skin and bones – but it is also used to describe the lesser parts of ourselves – the animal nature, the cravings, the wretched parts of ourselves that keep holding on to sin no matter how hard we try to do what is right.
That is what Paul is talking about… not these good, old, sometimes worn-out bodies of ours.
In fact, this passage from Romans is a reminder that God’s abundant life, that God’s very Spirit dwells within these bodies. Far from being an argument against our earthly life – this is a challenge to live up to the potential of what we can in fact DO with God’s spirit living within us.

So this morning, we go all the way back to the beginning, to that time when God made the heavens and the earth.
As Mel shared with us, Genesis tells us that God formed humanity from the dust of the earth. We were made out of the same stuff as all of the rest of creation.
But then God did something amazing.
God breathed into us.
The breath of life filled us.
The Spirit of the Lord entered our lives and these bodies became God’s body. You and I became the hands and the feet of God in the world.

That doesn’t mean that we have responded perfectly. After all, one of the first things that Adam and Eve did with the Spirit of God dwelling inside of them was to focus more on their own desires than what God wanted them to do. They lived according to the flesh, the sarx, and allowed temptation to distract them.
They sought their own comfort and pleasure before the well-being of the world or God’s creation. Their sin had consequences for not only themselves, but all of creation.

But, our scriptures tell us, God found another way to empower our bodies with the divine spirit…
God came and took on our flesh.
In that tiny child in Bethlehem, in the incarnation of Jesus, the very Word of God took on our human life.
Every aspect of our bodily existence was experienced by God.
Love and loss.
Stubbed toes and broken promises.
Laughter and tears.
Fear and grief.
Jesus experienced the fullness of our lives – and the ultimate depths of suffering and death.
And then, Jesus gave the Spirit to all who would be his disciples.

All summer long, we have been talking about the blessings of that gift and what it looks like when the Spirit dwells within us. Our lives begin to bear the fruit of love and joy, peace and kindness, goodness and gentleness, faithfulness, self-control, community, surrender, and patience.
But none of it happens without our bodies.
The Spirit cannot move without these hands and feet, eyes and ears.
When we let the Spirit of God become incarnate in OUR lives, and to fill up OUR bodies, then we are empowered to live very differently in this world.
We are set free from sin and death.
We are set free to love God more than we love ourselves.
We are set free to participate in God’s saving work in this world.

I’ve been thinking a lot this past week about what difference it has made that we spent this whole summer talking about the Holy Spirit. I’ve been wondering what it might look like to really add flesh and blood to these words that we have been saying all year long.
And I realized as I have watched not only the devastation of Harvey, but also the outpouring of human kindness just how important and precious our bodies really are.
Perhaps you were as heartbroken as I when you saw the nursing home residents under water…
and then wept for relief when I knew they had been rescued.
All across the region, people pushed
and carried
and turned to one another for support.
and now countless folks whose homes have been destroyed turn to one another and to us.
What does it mean to be the church in the wake of something like Harvey? Or the landslides earlier this year in Sierra Leone? Or the flooding in India?
PUT ON UMCOR HAT –
It means that we roll up our sleeves and we get to work.
We send flood buckets to help clean up.
We turn our sanctuaries into shelters
We build up trained helpers who have the knowledge and skills to truly make a difference.
and through a simple thing like toothbrushes and soap, we help take care of people’s bodies.

Today – you’ll have the opportunity to give a little bit extra towards disaster response by writing in the memo of your check or putting in one of the envelopes in the pew, or giving online towards disaster relief.

But, I also want you to hear two specific invitations… ways you can use YOUR bodies to make a difference.
First… if you feel called to go and help and put to use your hands and feet there is an opportunity to join one of the Early Response Teams. There are a few fliers on the back table about a training that is happening THIS coming Saturday right here in Des Moines.
Second… as a church, I want to challenge us to help take care of some of those bodies by putting together health kits. Beginning NEXT Sunday, we will have a bulletin board right outside of the sanctuary where you can indicate which specific items you will commit to bringing as we first gather and then assemble these kits.
Then, for our Fifth Sunday Service Project in October we’ll put all of these kits together and send them out with the Thanksgiving Ingathering.

Whenever we let the Spirit of God live within us, the transformation of the world begins.
Thanks be to God. Amen!