grace – Page 6 – Salvaged Faith

law or grace?

Posted on March 7, 2009Leave a comment

i was talking with a friend tonight about guilt and its absolutely pervasive impact on our lives. She was talking about something that is a normal and healthy part of her life and yet there was still residual guilt from societal standards that come up afterwards.

Guilt is such a terrible terrible thing. And I think I feel that way because I’m troubled by the fact we just can’t figure out how to live as people under grace…. we still think we are under the law and that we are constatnly being measured up against something.

I know I do it all the time. I neglect to spend an afternoon visiting church members and instead spend it connecting with colleagues online and I feel guilty. I don’t practice my guitar, and I feel guilty. I look at the dishes piled up on my counter, and I feel guilty. And those are just simple things. Guilt pervades our lives.

And it pervades my church. I think my biggest uphill battle in this congregation is trying to get people to stop talking about hell and the law and having to “straighten up and fly right” (they say this ALL THE TIME!) and to just focus on loving one another and loving ourselves and loving God. I think it comes down to Paul’s own struggle with the law that he had lived with his whole life. He wanted so much to live by grace, but was constantly seeing his body in the light of the law.

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but there is a guy I visit with who wants to know why I don’t talk about hell more, why I’m not preaching for people to flee from the wrath to come. I don’t see our faith that way. My faith and my salvation is about restoring my relationship with God, not making sure I don’t spend an eternity burning in hell. And in relationships, we are constantly growing and changing and we make mistakes, but it is the willingness to keep being in the relationship that matters. I think that is why the idea of covenant is so important and why God, no matter now many times Israel was unfaithful to the covenant, found ways to bring them back into relationship. the problem wasn’t that they did bad things. the problem was they neglected their relationship with God and put something else in God’s place.

I’ve been married for only a year and a half – but even in that short time, I know what that is like. We make mistakes all the time. We treat each other like crap somedays, and sometimes we make poor choices like putting work or down time or making dinner before each other. It happens. But if we were to let the past and all of the ways we have not fulfilled our marriage covenant determine our future, if we were to carry all of those mistakes with us and bring guilt into the present, we would never be able to forgive and love one another. The biggest piece of marriage advice I got was to never go to bed angry with one another. On the flip side, never go to bed feeling bad about something you have done.

What if we lived that kind of relationship with God? Where inspite of our failings, we went to bed leaving the past behind us and with a renewed commitment to be in relationship for another day? Covenants are not about prescribed standards and boxes to check and things we have to do – it is about a choice to be in relationship. And in a healthy relationship, there can be no guilt.

rainbows.

Posted on March 1, 2009Leave a comment

Today in church, we painted a rainbow. As we remembered God’s promise to Noah after the flood – we affirmed, as a congregation, that we are blessed by God.

We follow a God who desires not the death of a sinner, but that we all repent and live.

We follow a God who promises to be, and has been, with us through the storms of our lives.

We follow a God who reached down into the dust of the earth to breath life into humanity – and then, even when we turned away, came down and became the dust of the earth to redeem us.

I found this writing by Bruce Pewer a few years ago in one of his sermons on this text and it continues to stay with me:

Rejoice in the rainbow. It is the sign of God’s steadfast love which promises not destruction but hope and reconstruction. It is on the basis of God’s covenant love that we dare to confront evil; it enables us to laugh in the face of the evil one, taking initiative and daring to be pro-active.

Against all the evil you see in the world, against all the injustice and corruption you observe in our nation, against all the perverse evil you see raising its sneaky head within yourself, dare to paint a rainbow!

Paint a rainbow over your frustrating failings and wilful sins, and over your irksome doubts and ignorance.

Over your sins within family life, or the ugly compromises you may have had to make in the sphere of your daily work, set that rainbow.

Project a rainbow over the motley fellowship which is the church, with its flawed ministers, stumbling leaders and its sometimes passive congregations.

In your mind paint a rainbow wherever flawed and lost humanity struggles to find a way of its own mess.

The rainbow is a permanent sign of God’s faithful love. A love which not only creates, but constantly recreates and redeems.

So today, we literally painted a rainbow to remember God’s promises. We painted a rainbow to remember how God has blessed us in the past. And we painted a rainbow to be a sign to us – even in these dark days – that God is with us, and that even in the wilderness of Lent, God will send angels to care for us.

In some ways – personally – with all of the excitement and joy that I wanted this response to hold, as a congregation we had heavy hearts this morning. Right before the service, we learned of the sudden death of one of our own. In more ways than one, this message about the rainbow in the midst of storm clouds really served as comfort and hope, even in the midst of our grief and sadness.

While there of course have been deaths in the congregation prior to this point, none have hit me quite so close as this one. We have said goodbye to many dear sweet older folks this past year, and in some ways, because I was new, and because many of them were in the nursing home and not actively present in the church, it has been easier to be the comforting pastor. This particular passing is the husband of someone I have gotten to know quite well in the past year. And I pray with all of my heart for God’s strength to help me minister to her and her family in these coming days.

life breathed into dust

Posted on February 25, 2009Leave a comment

today as we come forward to have the ashes placed upon our foreheads, as we remember what it means to be made of the dust of the earth, we tell the truth about our mortality and our sin.

we are nothing but dust – and to dust we shall return.

yet there is something profoundly missing in that story. because even in the beginning, as God formed us from the dust of the earth, from the clay of the ground, as God got down on hands and knees and got dirty… molding us and forming us… we were touched with the maker’s hands. and then the God of the universe breathed into Adam the breath of life.

as dust – we cannot escape from our mortality or our sin. as dust – there is no end possible but to return to the ground.

but we are not merely dust. God desires not the death of a sinner but a broken and contrite heart. God wants to bring life into our midst.

this time of lenten discipline is a time to open ourselves up to God’s grace. That may come through spiritual disciplines like fasting and prayer. it may come from denial of temptations (coffee and soda, anyone?). it may come from an attentive awareness to God’s movement in everyday things. But none of these practices in and of themselves earn God’s love – will bring us salvation… we do them simply to spend time with God, we do them for the sake of God, practicing these disciplines focus our lives on God and that in and of itself brings its own reward.

D is for Daily Bread

Posted on September 21, 2008Leave a comment

So often when we read the passage about the day laborers, we hear it from the perspective of those who were chosen first and we think about how unfair it is that others have recieved what we have been promised. So today, let us open our minds to hear the gospel message from the perspective of the ones who were chosen last…

My name is Carla. And I am a day laborer. Each and every single morning I get up at 4:30 and I try to find something in the pantry to feed my son. He is twelve years old. But paying for his school supplies and getting school clothes has been expensive this year, so breakfasts aren’t quite as filling as they used to be. I get breakfast started, and then I go and wake my son up. It’s early for him, but we’ve got to head out early in the morning if I want to have a chance for work today. Luckily, the Home Depot where I gather with others each day has a shelter that they have put up… and the bus that stops in front of the store will take my son to school. It isn’t the best arrangement in the world and I worry for him, but it’s the only option we have. So we head out together, hand in hand.

Every morning, this is my routine. On weekends, my son stays with his grandmother, but every weekday, we head here together. And we wait.

This particular morning, I was tired. I was tired of waiting for work. The economy is particularly hard this year. Sometimes we pass a newspaper amongst ourselves, but you don’t have to read the headlines to know that things are tough. The numbers of foreclosures and record low homes sales are just that, numbers – we can tell every morning that there is trouble because there are fewer contractors and construction crews coming around to hire us. The landscapers I worked for last summer have gone out of business. Work was never really steady before – but now, it’s almost nonexistent.

In the last six days, I have only been hired once. That day, a contractor stopped by and we painted the outside of a woman’s house. Eight hours of work, eighty dollars. I bought groceries that night, so that my son would have food for breakfast.

This morning, I was hopeful. I was hopeful that work will come today. The electricity bill is due tomorrow and I prayed that I would have money to pay it. The last time our electricity was cut off, we had to stay with my mother-in-law, in her cramped little apartment.

About six o’clock, a man pulled up in a pick-up truck and said he had work! It’s a bit early for harvest, but he said that his fields were ripe and ready and he needed some help – it would be a full days worth of work. Well, all of our hands shot up in the air – of course we all wanted this job. But he couldn’t take everyone. He took Sam, who is probably the strongest of all of us. He took Mark who is young and fit and honestly a good worker. He took a few others, and I couldn’t help but notice that they were the ones who always get chosen first. The ones who as kids were always picked first for the game of dodgeball. All of them were promised $150 for their work that day… and I could only dream of what that would do to help my family out. But the truck pulled away and I wasn’t on it. I looked down at my son who was sitting on the bench behind me, and was glad that he slept through my disappointment.

Perhaps all of our hopes got up by that one landowner because there was a good spirit among us for an hour or so. The bus was coming soon, so I gently woke my son up and walked him over to the stop and got him on the right bus. And I went back to waiting. Another hour ticked by, and the lot of us were still standing there. One car pulled up needing a skilled electrician – and so two people were chosen… but not me. My husband was amazing with his hands – he knew everything there was to know about wiring and building… He died of cancer two years ago – the medical costs ate up all of our savings and I have little skills. I stayed at home with our son. When my husband died, we lost the house. We lost everything. This is our life now.

Nine o’clock rolled around and I looked up to see that old blue pick-up truck roll back by our shelter. It was the first man again – the man with the field. He said he could use a few more… that they were finding there was more work than he thought. So he looked us over. I tried to stand up tall. I tried to wipe the tiredness from my eyes. He chose five from among us. But I wasn’t chosen. They hopped in the back of his truck and headed out to the field.

About noon, my stomach started to grumble, but I couldn’t leave- not when someone might come by any minute looking for workers. Often a contractor would come by over the lunch hour and hire people for the afternoon. And sure enough, I heard the rumble of an engine pulling up. It was the same blue pick-up truck, the same man looking out at us from the driver’s seat. “I need a few more,” he said – “I’ll pay you what is fair… you three – climb on in.” He wasn’t pointing at me. He was pointing at the three Vietnamese immigrants who were standing together to one side. They climbed in and the truck headed out.

As the afternoon went on, a few of us started to filter away. Hopes were down – there just wasn’t going to be any more work today. My son’s bus didn’t stop until about 4:30… I might as well wait that long, you never know, right?

Every time a car passed us, we stood in anxious anticipation. But many of them were just customers of the store trying to get out of the parking lot. No one was looking for workers. We stood anyways – the same up and down over and over again. About 3:00, I was amazed to see that same old blue pickup pull over to the shelter. He looked at all of us, almost with a look of pity, and hopped out. I have a bit more work – he said gently – I know it’s late, but I’ll pay you what is fair for the few hours that are left. There were seven of us left – but the truck was full of supplies and not all of us would fit. He took three.

At least I would get to wait for my son, I thought, trying to see the silver lining in all of this. But after five days of no work, the silver lining was dull and grey. I dreaded having to tell him yet again that there was no work today. I just wouldn’t be able to face him if we had to pack up a bag and move in with his grandma again. We can take care of ourselves, right mom? He had said the last time. I’m starting to think that it’s just not possible.

My son’s bus came and he hopped off and he looked around – I could tell he was hoping I wasn’t there. It wasn’t a long walk back to our apartment and he had made it countless times before. If I wasn’t there, it meant we would have a hot dinner tonight when I eventually made it back. But there I was. Under the shelter. He looked straight at me, and then turned to head up the street.

I wanted to run after him, to yell at him for disrespecting me like that, but I felt nothing but shame. Shame that I couldn’t support us. Shame that there wasn’t enough food in the cupboards. Shame that he saw me for what I truly was. Worthless. I wanted to go home, but I couldn’t face him. Not yet. And there were still a few others under the shelter – also dreading heading home with nothing in their hands. So I stood there and waited.

Not fifteen minutes went by, and I started to hear the familiar chug of an old engine. I figured that the farmer was starting to bring people back in from his field, so I thought nothing of it – but when the truck got closer – I realized it was empty. He slowly pulled up to the two of us who were left and leaned out the window. “Why have you been standing here all day?” he asked. It seemed to me like a dumb question – so I spouted back before I could bite my tongue – “Because no one hired us!” I looked away, not wanting to see his response. It seemed like a long three seconds – like a lifetime was passing by – and then he spoke again. “Hop in – I’ll take you out to the field.”

He didn’t say anything about pay – and it seemed ludicrous to go out and work when the sun would be setting in a few hours, but I looked at John next to me, John who only has three fingers on his left hand because of some construction accident a few years ago, and he shrugged. “C’mon,” he said, “at least we can feel like we have done something today.” So we climbed in the truck.

We got out to the field quickly. I was amazed at what I saw – bushels and bushels and bushels of the biggest grapes I had seen in my life. I was so eager to work that day I never stopped to ask what kind of fields the man had. And it didn’t matter, work was work. We hopped out and he pointed toward the bushel baskets – “all of them have to be loaded,” he said – just pitch in where you can.

With the whole lot of us, loading was quick work. We piled the baskets high in a nearby wagon, so that the tractor could take them to the processor. An hour went by before we knew it, and the job was done. The man who owned the fields gathered all of us up together and thanked us for our work. Then he called over to his foreman and handed him an envelope. Pay time.

The foreman called John and I up first and handed us each three crisp fifty dollar bills. My mouth dropped open and I began to stutter. “Umm, there must be some mistake,” I said – “This is too much money… we’ve only been working for an hour.”

“What did you get?” someone called out behind me, and I showed him the bills. But the foreman looked at us and simply called out, “Next.”

Group by group, the workers came forward, amazed at what we had received and I could tell, they were expectantly hoping for more. But by the time that first group – the six who were picked early that morning – we began to realize that he was paying everyone the same amount. Everyone walked away with $150 – the amount that first group had been promised.

Sam, the big guy, was the first to speak up. “Hey, now what’s going on here?!” he yelled – “how come all of those guys got the same amount as we did – we’ve been working here, slaving in the sun all day long?”

I was sort of wondering the same thing… To be honest, I would have been grateful for just five or ten dollars – something to take home, something to feed my son with.

The owner of the vineyard came forward from where he was leaning against his old blue truck – “Am I doing you any wrong,” he asked? “Didn’t I promise you $150 this morning? You have been given what you were promised, but I choose to give to even these last ones the same amount – am I not allowed to be generous with my money?”

I felt undeserving, I felt unworthy, but I clutched those bills tightly in my hand the whole way back. I was nothing but grateful. Grateful for the hope this brought to my family. Grateful for the chance to work at all. Grateful that I would be able to go home to my son and bring something to the table for dinner. Grateful that we would be able to make it another month with the electricity. Simply grateful.

I bought a hot loaf of fresh bread and a couple cans of beef stew to take home – the rest would be saved for the bills. My son was surprised when I walked in carrying a grocery bag, he looked up and for the first time in a week, I saw him smile.

I warmed the stew up on the stove and set the table before us, bowls of stew for each and the loaf of bread set proudly in the middle of the table. My son came over and I started to say grace like I usually do – with the Lord’s Prayer.

Our Father, who art in heaven… hallowed by thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread…” I paused. For half a second I paused and realized what I was saying. The warm yeasty smell of the bread between us rose up and filled my senses. “Give us this day our daily bread…” I began again – but couldn’t go on. My eyes watered up and my son squeezed my hand and finished the prayer for the both of us.

That prayer had always seemed so simple, so meaningless – like something that we just said because we were supposed to until tonight. As my son dug into his stew and ripped a chunk off of the bread, I started to think about what that landowner did for me today. While he taught us all something about money and being generous – while he taught me today that even being one of the last ones chosen, that I was still worthy of that money, he also showed me what God’s grace can look like.

I thought about the Hebrew people out there in the desert, wandering around… completely dependent upon God. And I thought about how anxious they were, how scared, so scared in fact that they forgot about all of the miraculous and amazing ways that God had rescued them from Egypt. But God took care of them. God promised that he would provide, and each day gave them the gift of heavenly manna – their daily bread.

Did they deserve it? Probably not after all of their grumbling. Did I deserve this feast tonight? Definitely not. But what I realized today is that God doesn’t give us what we deserve – God gives us what we need. They didn’t have to be rescued and I didn’t have to be picked today… but I was and they were – and that in and of itself is something to be grateful for.

And I’m not talking about just money. I’m not talking about just things. I’m talking about life itself. Give us this day our daily bread – give us this day our daily dose of grace. Grace doesn’t come in sizes. I don’t get less grace because I’m a widowed single mother who doesn’t make it to church every Sunday. That pastor down the street who wears the fancy stole doesn’t get more because he stands up to preach every Sunday. I don’t get less grace for all the times I have doubted or decided to rely on my self rather than God. And those people who have believed since they were infants don’t get more. Grace can’t be measured. It is simply given and given abundantly.

Tonight I tucked my son into bed and I read my nightly devotions. Some nights I don’t quite get to them because the day has been too long… but tonight, I felt like I wanted to spend time in God’s word, to simply spend time with God as a sign of my gratefulness. I opened up the bible to Philippians: Paul wrote there, “For me, living is Christ and dying is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me…. I know that I will remain and continue with all of you for your progress and joy in faith, so that I may share abundantly in your boasting in Christ Jesus… only live your life in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ – stand firm in one spirit, strive side by side with one mind for the faith of the gospel, and don’t be intimidated by your opponents.”

Life in the flesh means fruitful labor – it means working every day to live a life worth of the gospel of Christ.

Throw Me a Bone Here!

Posted on August 17, 2008Leave a comment

Some days, I think that my cat Turbo secretly wishes to be a dog. He does things that are at times very odd for a cat – like wanting to have his belly rubbed or playing fetch. He also is very good about communicating to us when he is ready to play because he walks into the room with a toy firmly in his mouth and meows… Mraow!

The thing is, our lovely, adorable, little Turbo never wants to play when WE are ready to play. It’s always in the middle of writing a sermon or in the middle of a really intense part of a movie that he shows up ready to go. And he doesn’t make it easy for us either. You see, Turbo likes to stand just outside of the reach of our arms – about four feet away from wherever we are sitting and he drops his toy and looks at us. It’s like he’s saying… “Come and Get it!” Get up and come over here. Drop whatever you are doing and pay attention to me!

Sometimes, I think that its rather annoying. Sometimes I really just wish that he would go away and find someone or something else to play with. Because I have other more important things to focus on. But he stands there near me, with that cute little mraow! And pretty soon, I can’t help but give in.

How many of you have pets in your family? Whether they are big or they are small, whether they live outside or inside, pets are in 63% of American households. I was curious to find out a little more about all of these pets and found estimates from the American Pet Products Manufacturers Association that Americans own approximately 73 million dogs, 90 million cats, 139 million freshwater fish, 9 million saltwater fish, 16 million birds, 18 million small animals and 11 million reptiles.

That’s a lot of animals!

The thing about pets is that they have this amazing ability to make us better people. According to a pet therapist, “Love is the most important medicine and pets are one of nature’s best sources of affection. Pets relax and calm. They take the human mind off loneliness, grief, pain, and fear. They cause laughter and offer a sense of security and protection. They encourage exercise and broaden the circle of one’s acquaintances.” (http://www.sniksnak.com/therapy.html)

This morning, we hear a very different sort of story from Matthew about a how a woman who was callously called a dog – widened the circle of God’s love for Jesus, for the disciples, for the church itself, all in a conversation about table scraps.

And so as I thought about those two things together: about how much I love my cat and how sometimes he really pushes me to the limits and challenges me to move beyond what I am doing, about how he helps me to love more – and about how much that woman was hated and yet how she pushed the boundaries of the gospel and helped Jesus to love better – I got to thinking about table scraps and ever-widening circles. Table scraps and ever widening circles.

First of all, a little background on this passage of scripture. Jesus is walking around with his disciples way out on the border lands of Israel – out by Tyre and Sidon. Now, this would have been like venturing into Iowa State territory for these disciples…. If they were Hawkeye fans that is. People talk funny out there, people look different (okay, well not all that different), but there is definitely some long held animosity between the people of Israel and the people “over there.”

Before they realize it, this woman comes up to them…. And not just any woman, some crazy, foolish Canaanite woman, who starts yelling and begging and pleading with them to heal her demon-possessed daughter. I can just see the disciples now… are you sure that your daughter needs the help… because you are kind of freaking us out!

And then Jesus – the one who is always supposed to have the answers and who models to us how to treat others – surprisingly just ignores the woman. Doesn’t even bother to give her the time of day.

Now, if I were a disciple, and I saw Jesus ignoring someone – I’m not quite sure what I would have thought. It probably seemed like an affirmation of their worst thoughts and assumptions about this woman. It probably seemed like they were way too good to stop and pay attention to this persistent, annoying woman who was starting to make a scene. And so one of the worked up the courage to tug on Jesus sleeve and said… “Let’s figure out some way to ditch this lady… she’s getting on our nerves!”

Now, in most of our scriptures about Jesus, here is the point where Jesus would very firmly put the disciples in their place – take care of the woman’s concern – no matter who she was – and they would be on their way. Hopefully with the disciples having learned a very important lesson. Whenever I read this passage from Matthew, I am ready and waiting and longing for Jesus to give those hooligans a talking to.

But he doesn’t. We don’t know what is going on inside of his head, but he says something very strange to our ears – even today. Jesus says, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel.” I was sent only to the Jews – that is my mission, that is my focus, that is what I am going to do.

And this woman, this Caananite, certainly wasn’t a Jew. In the gospel of Mark she is called a Syro-Phoenecian woman, but whatever way you look at it, she was definitely not included in the bunch Jesus had in mind. If you remember all the way back to Moses and the promised land, all the way back to Abraham and Isaac and Jacob… the Israelites were promised the land of the Caananites – the land of these people – to live in, to have as their inheritance from God.

Probably the best way that I can communicate to you the kind of racism, hatred and animosity that existed between these people is to think back about a hundred years to the way that Native Americans were treated in our country. Although they lived here long before Europeans ever set foot on the continent, those who came believed that this land of America was our promised land. It was a gift from God and a place where we could grow and live and love. But what came as a result of that was the demonization of a whole group of people – who were seen as nothing more than mongrels and barbarians and dogs to the white culture.

So imagine that kind of history between them, with those kinds of walls dividing this Canaanite woman and Jesus and his disciples, not to mention the fact that he is a man and she is a woman…. knowing that she is not included and not welcomed – this woman drops to her knees in an act of worship and begs Jesus… Lord, Help me.

Scott Hoezee, a biblical scholar wrote in his reflection this week that Jesus’ “ministry is a kind of extended heavenly feeding. (In the previous chapter Jesus fed bread to 5,000 people. Immediately following this morning’s story he will do something similar feeding bread to 4,000 people. Jesus is the bread of life.) And so, this woman is asking for a place at the table, but Jesus, chillingly, relegates her to the floor of life. ‘It’s not right to toss perfectly good bread meant to feed the children to the dogs.’ Jesus calls her a dog. It’s a kind of slur, an epithet, and the disciples no doubt approved.” (Scott Hoezee http://cep.calvinseminary.edu/thisWeek/index.php)

Jesus has just denied this woman what she wants, what she longs for. He has not only done that, but he has insulted her in front of all of these other people.

But what I love about this woman is that she never backs down. She is quick and witty, she rolls with the punches that are thrown at her and she boldly speaks back. “Okay, so you want to call me a dog? Fine. You say that as a dog I don’t deserve the food off of the table. Fine. But you know what? Even dogs get the leftovers from the table. Even dogs get the crumbs that fall under the children’s feet. Even dogs deserve that… so, c’mon! throw me a bone here Jesus!”

Table scraps and ever-widening circles.

Edwin Markham once wrote a quick little poem called Outwitted that describes for me what is going on here. It goes:

He drew a circle that shut me out —
Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout.
But love and I had the wit to win:
We drew a circle that took him in.

We drew a circle that took him in… table scraps and ever widening circles.

We don’t know why Jesus initially excluded her, except that he felt like he had a mission to preach the Kingdom of God to the Israelites. So in a sense, he had drawn a line – a boundary – he had placed a limit on what he was willing or able or felt called to do. He had drawn a circle that shut her out.

But then this woman had the wit and the courage and daring to flip his statements on him and to draw the circle big enough so that she was not only included, but that others could be included as well.

In our Roundtable Pulpit discussion this week, we talked a lot about the table scraps – the crumbs from the gospel feast that are leftover or fall to the floor. Jesus is of course talking about himself, and his ministry and his calling to find and feed and care for the children of Israel. But even as he does so, as he goes out into the world teaching and preaching, there will be others around who will benefit also. They might have been eavesdropping as Jesus preached the Sermon on the Mount. Maybe they were the neighbors of someone who was healed. Perhaps they saw the multiplication of the loaves and fishes – were on the outskirts of the crowd as the food was passed around. In any case, there were numerous people who were not of the Jewish faith and heritage, who were receiving the gospel. Whether or not Jesus was talking directly to them.

We don’t know if Jesus knew this all along and he was just acting out the kind of transformation he wanted his disciples to embody, or if Jesus really did learn and grow as a result of his conversation with this woman.

What we DO know is that after she had drawn the circle bigger – by having the courage to say that even she, a “dog though she may be”, had the right to eat the table scraps – Jesus had nothing but praise and willingness in his heart toward her.

“Woman! You have GREAT FAITH!” He cried out. Like she had won a prize at the fair he made sure that everyone around him – Jew and Gentile alike – knew that this woman, this Canaanite, this nobody who he had but moments ago unkindly called a “dog” – was not only faithful, but that her plea for help would be answered. Immediately, we are told, her daughter was healed.

Here is the talking to I was waiting for! Here is the moment when this woman and Jesus partner up to stretch all of our hearts open just a little bit farther. And as they do so, they challenge all of us to think about who we are ministering to out in the world.

You see, it’s easy to get caught up in a mission. It’s easy to get caught up in one defined goal. But if we aren’t careful, we allow that one thing to so define our work in the world that we have in fact drawn a circle. We have built a wall and we have imprisoned the gospel. Because, although we may think we know exactly who should be included in our ministry, we have to remain open to whomever God sends our way. Because as Taylor says, God [is busy] rubbing out the lines we have drawn around ourselves and calling us into the limitless country of his love.

Dan Nelson writes that “Even Jesus, who presumably has diving authorization for his limits” – you know, that whole “I was sent…” thing – Even, Jesus “allows those limits to be stretched by another’s necessity. In other words, the rule here is that there is no rule, only a creative tension between our finite capacities and the world’s infinite need.” (http://sio.midco.net/danelson9/yeara/proper15a.htm)

Our finite capacities and the world’s infinite need.

Jesus as fully God never stopped being aware of this woman’s need and he never stopped loving her. But Jesus as the person who was also fully human was very aware of his limitations – of the demands on his time and energy. And maybe in this situation he had some of his priorities mixed up, but the love and the mercy were always there.

That’s the message that we get from our Romans text this morning. Paul is here writing about whether or not the love of God changes – if people can ever fall out of their standing with God – if we can ever be rejected. And his message is simple: NO. You see, as many times as we turn our back upon God’s grace and mercy, God never turns God’s back upon us. God is always there, waiting to take us back in and longing for each one of us to turn to him.

In the Old Testament, Israel was chosen, not because they were the only ones that God loved, but because they were to be a beacon to the nations – they were charged with the task of making God’s name known throughout the world. God’s vision and God’s love was always universal in scope – but that love began in just one corner of the world with one group of people.

As Paul writes Romans, he is living in a world in which his own people – those lost children of Israel that Jesus kept talking about – have rejected Jesus as their savior. They are like ungrateful children who take the bread that has been graciously set on the table and throw it on the floor.

And ironically – Paul says – their disobedience, has allowed all of us to gather up the crumbs and has allowed all of us to enter into a life with God.

The Message translation of the Bible has this wonderful way of sharing that message with us and it reads:

There was a time not so long ago when you were on the outs with God. But then the Jews slammed the door on him and things opened up for you. Now they are on the outs. But with the door held wide open for you, they have a way back in. In one way or another, God makes sure that we all experience what it means to be outside so that he can personally open the door and welcome us back in.

God makes sure that we all expedrience what it means to be on the outside, so that he can personally open the door and welcome us back in. The reality is, all of us have disobeyed. All of us have turned our backs on God at one point in our lives or another. All of us are as unworthy as the disciples thought that Canaanite woman was to receive God’s grace.

And yet it is offered anyways.

And it keeps being offered in ways that stretch us and stretch our hearts and stretch the gospel around the world. In our final hymn today, we will sing in the second verse the following words:

Wider grows the kingdom, reign of love and light;
for it we must labor, till our faith is sight.
Prophets have proclaimed it, martyrs testified,
poets sung its glory, heroes for it died.
Forward through the ages, in unbroken line,
move the faithful spirits at the call divine.

Forward through the ages, that love of God has gone. Forward through the ages there have been people both shut out and pulled into that glorious kingdom by our actions and by our words.

We are finite and there are limits to what we can do – but never should we put boundaries around the gospel. Never should we try to determine who is and who isn’t worthy. Because our boundaries will never be able to contain the vastness of God’s love and mercy.

ABC’s of …

Posted on July 14, 20085 Comments

I spent a lot of time in the car last week – having to drive to the hospital in another city and then traveling yet again to meet with my clergy mentor. And as I did so, I kept thinking about how we can really ramp up energy for the fall and then sustain it. What would get people who haven’t been in a while to come back? What would be appealing for those in our community who have never checked out our church? How can we reach out and really start at the basics?

And then it hit me… back to school… back to the basics… what about focusing this fall, beginning with the return to our normal schedule/sunday school/3rd grade bible give out, on the ABC’s?

I struggle with the ABC’s of what… ABC’s of the church? ABC’s of faith? ABC’s of Christianity? So bear with me as I figure that one out… (or if you have suggestions – please comment!!!)

I’m also a fairly consistent lectionary preacher, so in thinking about this, I’ve been trying to figure out how each Sunday, from Aug 31 to Nov 23 (because then we start Lent), fits not only a letter, but also the weekly texts. Some have worked beautifully. Others, not so well. So I’m asking for some help.

1) Am I trying to hard to make this concept work?
2) Suggestions for the letters that have no direction yet (B, H, I, L)

Here is what I have so far:

A: Alpha/Omega or I AM

focusing on who God is, using the burning bush scriptures from Exodus, and combining this and the previous week’s gospels – Mt 16:13-28

B: Body of Christ, Blessed, ?

scriptures for the week include teaching on how to reach when someone offends you in the church, the institution of passover, and in Romans, the call to love and call to prepare for salvation by putting on Christ. Sidenote: after reading a sermon recently on Psalm 119 – I really was thinking about using “Bible” for my B… so that may be an entirely different direction

C: Care, Compassion, Community

scriptures include the law of forgiveness, the call not to judge one another, and the parting of the sea in exodus. Originally when I thought about this series, I really wanted to focus on care during this week – and to emphasize our role as a community to care for one another, and my desire to care for them. I’ve noticed that people don’t call me or tell me when something happens in their lives – like if they have to go in for surgery or suddenly end up in the hospital – which may be simply that they aren’t used to telling their pastor these things. I want to talk about how together we are supposed to care for each other.

D: Disciple (but I was really thinking about Doubt too)

scriptures: Paul’s exhortation to live lives worthy of the gospel, the parable of the landowner and the wages for workers, and if I went the doubt route – the manna and quails and the people grumbling in the wilderness

E: Emptying

I really wanted to use Kenosis for K… and then realized that the Christ Hymn fell on the E Sunday – which is perfect! (since its the same concept)

F: Faith (and maybe Fear also) ooo… maybe Fall?

This is also World Communion Sunday – so I was stuck a bit. The scriptures for the week don’t fit really well with the scope of world communion Sunday and I was stretching trying to make fruit work. Scriptures are supposed to include the parable of the wicked tenants, the 10 commandments, and the example of Paul – I press on toward the prize of the heavenly call of God in Christ. I could use the wicked tenants and the 10 commandments to talk about the Fall, and our place before God – why we need the law. But another idea is to actually take the readings from August 10 and use them here: Jesus walking on the water (faith and fear) along with Paul talking about faith and the idea that there is no distinction between Jew and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all. (which I think works much better for World Communion Sunday). Thoughts?

G: Grace

This would be a great time to talk about grace from the Wesleyan perspective. I think the three main readings can help illustrate prevenient grace (the sinners invited to the feast), justifying grace (moses interceding after the golden calf), and sanctifying grace (stand firm, help one another, rejoice from Philippians)

H: Holy, Holy Spirit, Humility

I’m stuck here. Readings include Jesus call to render unto Caesar that which is Caesar’s, as well as the pharisees trying to trap Jesus in questions; Moses having the chance to encounter God’s presence, but not being able to look at God’s face; and Paul giving thanks for the Thessalonians who received the gospel with power and the Holy Spirit. Could go lots of different ways.

I: ? Instruction? Idolatry?

Again, stuck here. Readings include the greatest command – to love, the death and burial of Moses, and Paul assuring the Thessalonians that he comes to bring them not only God’s word, but also their true hearts (you are witnesses to how blameless our conduct was towards you)

J: Joy, Journey, Jordan River

All Saints Sunday – which fits in PERFECTLY. Joshua is leading the people across the river Jordan where they remember the promise of God and leave 12 stones for remembrance, Paul gives thanks for witnesses, and Matthew warns against trying to be better, but that we should all be servants – what a great day to celebrate the saints among us who have passed before us?

K: Kingdom of God/Heaven

parable of the 10 bridesmaids (the kingdom of heaven will be like this!), choose this day who you will serve (Joshua)

L: ? (Lord, Light, Love, Law, Life, Lord’s Prayer, Logos)

readings include the parable of the talents; Paul claiming that the Lord will come like a theif in the night – so we should be children of the light; and simply the introduction of Deborah as a judge – not even the full story. Part of me wants to switch this week with the greatest command to love scriptures (week I) – which would mean going a different direction with week I (could they just be flip-flopped?)

M: Messiah

Christ the King Sunday – Readings include the sheep and the goats, Christ as the head of the church, and Ezekiel’s description of the shepherd who seeks the lost.

That brings me to the first Sunday of Advent – which I want to focus on in its fullness.

Three Simple Rules: Do No Harm

Posted on July 6, 2008Leave a comment

Once upon a time, a small group of Christians approached their teacher. “Mr. Wesley,” they said timidly, “you have been preaching to us over and over again about the wrath is to come. We want to follow Jesus, we want to experience God’s salvation. But how do we get from here…. To there?”

Well that teacher, Mr. Wesley himself, was a man who had struggled with that very question. You see, growing up, he thought that he always had to be doing something in order to prove himself worthy of God. He was always looking for some method, some way, some path that he was supposed to walk on in order to get to God. Or maybe, it was that he was looking for some way of finding the assurance of his salvation. You see, for Wesley and that small group that approached him, it seemed like the wrath of God was always hanging over their heads, just waiting for some little sin to come along so that it could pounce.

In his younger years, Wesley had tried all sorts of things to bring him that assurance, to prove that he was safely in the arms of God’s love. He meticulously kept a journal of all the things that he did in a day – as a way of measuring his progress. He fasted two days a week. He got up at 4 am to pray and study. He spent time in prisons visiting those who were lost and in orphanages visiting those who were abandoned. And he met with fellow believers, always seeking to learn more about what God demands of our lives.

But you see, Wesley had a little problem as well. As much as his type A personality didn’t want to admit it, he found multiple places in the scriptures where it says “faith and not works” is what saves us. Sometimes he was trying too hard. Making the path more difficult than it really had to be.

Out of all of that straining and trying and pushing and pulling of his own experience, when this small group of people came to him and asked “what should we do,” Wesley had an idea. He arranged a time when they could all gather together to pray. And then weekly they continued together to pray, they gathered together to hear the gospel – to hear over and over again that they are beloved children of God and that God would provide the grace they needed to be transformed. And they gathered together to watch over one another in love – to point out when another was starting down the wrong path and to encourage faithful steps.

And when they did so, there were three things that they focused on – three rules that all people in the societies had to follow. Three ways to measure how they were in fact doing: First – Are you doing harm to others? Second – Are you doing good to others? Third – are you staying in love with God?

This week, we are going to focus on “doing no harm.” For Wesley, these included a number of things like: taking the name of God in vain; fighting, quarreling, taking your brother or sister to court; slaveholding; gossip; wearing gold and costly apparel; buying on credit things you cannot afford to pay for; and singing songs and reading books that don’t tend to the knowledge or love of God.

From the looks of it – it almost appears that Wesley’s rules are yet another addition to the 10 commandments, an attempt like those of the Pharisees to make things harder than they have to be – to place more obstacles between us and God’s love and grace. Don’t do this, Don’t do that. Lead boring lives of strict obedience and puritanical faith.

But that’s not what these are at all. In this first rule – that we should do no harm, is about taking the time to think about who is harmed and where is injustice done through our everyday actions.

Doing no harm is about taking the time to see other people as children of God and asking how they are affected by our decisions.

Because the truth of the matter is, even as Christians, we still make mistakes. We still take the wrong path at one time or another, We still have slips of the tongue and do hurtful things to the people we love. We still sin. The question is – how to we keep from doing it again? How do we prevent those things from eating us alive and enslaving us?

This is the same question that Paul is wrestling with in Romans. After all of his talk about living under grace now instead of the law, after all his talk about being free in Christ to choose the good he has a confession to make: No matter how hard I try, I still do those very things that I don’t want to do. Try as I might, I keep doing bad things.

And the old Paul – the Saul who lived under the law and whose faith required complete obedience… who taught that those who broke the law had punishment awaiting them… the old Saul would have been mortified by his sins. The old Saul may not have been able to live with himself – or would have lived in a state of denial and making excuses, always trying to avoid the truth about his failures.

But the new Paul… the new Paul who now lives under grace freely acknowledges what he has done wrong because he knows it’s the only way to let go it. It is the only way to forgive himself and to freely rest in God’s grace. We can only experience grace by accepting our lives as a whole – the good and the bad – and in the process, acknowledging where we are moving towards God.

There was once a Native American elder who described his own inner struggles, his inner war, in this manner: “Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time.” When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, “The one I feed the most.”

Making the simple precept of “do no harm” one of our most important goals in daily living is making the decision not to feed the mean dog. It is making the decision not to encourage the sort of behavior in ourselves or in others that will eventually lead to hurt and disappointment.

In our roundtable group this week, we talked about ways that some of these things are harmful – ways that they hurt rather than heal relationships. One of the group shared about a time when children were playing… got hurt… parent wanted to sue… offered to pay… not about hurting others, but taking the time to make things right… how foreign that was to the other person.

We live in a society where we are always looking for ways to hurt one another, to get to the top of the heap… it’s a dog eat dog world out there and you’ve got to get ahead.

If that means working on Sundays or making other’s work on Sundays – so be it. If that means finding tax breaks and worming your way through the law to get the cheapest goods- so be it. If that means buying expensive jewelry and the best clothes so that you can show just how successful you are and separate yourselves from the rest – so be it. If it means paying your employees as little as possible so that you can make an extra buck – so be it. If it means putting down others so you can look better – so be it.

That’s the way our world works. Or at least, that’s the way we try to make it work. But the truth of the matter is, we all just end up more bruised and battered and damaged than when we started.

And because that is the way that we have always done it, there just doesn’t seem to be another way. Paul laments about his sinful state, about his struggle to do good and his inevitable failure and like a lightbulb going off in his head he cries out: “Who will deliver me from this body of death?… I Thank God… through Jesus Christ our Lord.”

We struggle and we wrestle and on our own spend so much time focusing on all the bad things that we have done and continue to do in our life. But we need to be reminded that Christ himself promised he would teach us. “take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your souls.” so stop beating yourself up over not doing the good. walk with me, become my apprentice, cease from doing harm, and lay aside that burden of guilt.

For too long, we have focused on the wrath of God that hangs over us. When we do so, then all of these “simple rules” become hoops to jump through. They become things we do or don’t do to maintain our standing in an organization – to keep our membership. They become things we d oor don’t do because someone told us to. When we focus on the wrath of God, we are focusing on the law and following the law, and our lives become hollow – empty – cold.

But salvation is a gift from God… it is freely offered, without question, without cost, to anyone and everyone. Grace is a gift from God, always preceding us, always moving us, always ready to be given. The trouble is, we are always looking for the catch. We are always making excuses: I’m not worthy enough, I’m not ready yet, I have all of this guilt and past hanging over me.

That is the load that we have been carrying on our own. That is what we have yoked ourselves to and that is why Jesus calls out to his disciples: come to me, take my yoke of grace upon you, and let your soul be at rest. We have let so much come between us and God’s grace. Denial, guilt, other obligations. We need to set that yoke and those chains aside and finally rest in the peace of God’s love.

The gospel message is so hard to absorb because it seems too good to be true, to easy to be really real. We want to live in a world of black and white, good and bad, where those who do wrong are punished and justice is had for all.

But what Jesus says to us is: come to me, all of you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest. My burden is easy, my yoke is light.

What we want, are rules to follow – clear simple directions. Do this, don’t do that. And we want to know what the rewards and consequences are. We want to know what the ends are.

What is so hard to believe is that Jesus actually makes it very simple. I will give you rest from your burden – your burden of guilt, your burden of sin, your burden of despair. I will take all of that from you and teach you a new way. A new way to live. And I do this all freely – without cost.

Come to me, come to this table, come and take this life that I am freely giving you. Come and eat this bread and drink of this cup and remember that I have already taken your sin away. I have already died so that you may live. Come and find rest for your soul. Amen.

putting things off

Posted on February 11, 20083 Comments

I haven’t written in here for a while – and I have SO much to say. And only 20 minutes before I need to be at the hospital. So here is a checklist – 1) Breaking Bread, 2) Sand and Water at the beginning of Lent, 3) the roundtable pulpit group, 4) wrestling with grace and a phone call from someone in need.

Really my prompting this afternoon to actually get on here and type something comes from a book I started glancing at called “wrestling with grace” by Robert Corin Morris. In a few paragraphs he writes:

Often we don’t understand Jesus’ words clearly when we begin to respond to them. I have had a slow struggle with myself over Jesus’ seemingly clear challenge: “Give to everyone who asks” You can’t honor every request, can you? Certinaly not! What about beggars? How do you know they’re for real? What if an alcoholic wants a drink? What if there are more important priorities that claim my time right now? And yet, and yet… when I was in college I heard a man who simply did it. He always carried a bag of change when he walked the streets of new York; and if someone asked for money, he gave them some, along with a few moments of conversation and a warm “God bless you.” He said, “The Man told me to give, not to launch an investigation. I’m not in charge of the outcome.”

… I’m coming to see that Jesus doesn’t specify exactly what you’re supposed to give when someone asks. I hear him calling me to deal in some gracious and appropriate way with the person who asks; at least to give something: “Yes, I’d love to look at this book; can it wait till summer?” “Of course I’ll get those papers for you, right now.” “No, I’m not able to talk right now, but I’ll call you right back when I’m finished.” Give. Give something. Don’t turn away. And so the meaning of Jesus’ word keeps growing in my heart. (pgs 55-57)

This passage struck me because I got a call from a woman today who needed some help. And I immediately questioned the motivations, wanted to check out her story, was cautious of being scammed. They certainly don’t teach you in Divinity School how to respond to a request for money or for a bus ticket. I eventually said no, because our ministerial alliance has funds for gas, food and lodging, but not for purchasing bus tickets – the fare was four times what we are normally able to give.

But what if she was an angel unawares? Why should I investigate or judge her story? Did I really give anything to her? I started by giving her my time, but checking out the resources and promising to call her back and by doing so. But in the end, I felt slightly bad about the situation. If our church had a pastoral discretionary account, I probably would have done something. If I didn’t have my own bills to pay I might have even dipped into my own pocket. But I make excuses. And so Morris’ word to give… give something. don’t turn away. hit me like a load of bricks this afternoon. it is quite the challenge and I’m still left torn about what I can do.