respect – Salvaged Faith

Real Church is Messy

Posted on June 13, 2021Leave a comment

Acts 5:1-11, 6:1-7

This summer, as we study together through the book of Acts, I wish that we could talk about every single verse… but we simply don’t have time.

So I hope that you are checking out our daily video devotion – which can be found on our facebook page OR on our church website.

In fact, we made it even easier to find on our website… just go to iumc.org and scroll to the bottom and you’ll find the latest three posted right there!

Today, we are skipping over chapter three and four and diving into more of what it meant for these first faithful folks to live with one another.

Two weeks ago, our Director of Youth Ministry stood here and shared this beautiful, rosy picture of a church community that seemed perfect.

They devoted themselves to prayer and teaching and fellowship and sold everything they had and make sure everyone’s needs were met.

And, if you are anything like me, we hold our own imperfect, human community up to that standard and get a bit discouraged.

But never fear… things were not as perfect as they seemed.

This community was messy.

After all, it was full of humans, too.

Real humans with real problems.

People who are dishonest.

Others who are ignored.

There is jealousy, and complaining, and growing pains.

It is church, after all.

So let’s dive into the dirt and the muck as problems of the church appear in chapters 5 and 6.

First, we’ve got a problem that results from dishonesty and disrespect.

In our short video clip from The Bible Project, we are reminded once again of the temple.

God’s presence once led the people through the wilderness.

Then it was understood to dwell in the temple in Jerusalem… a building… and people would travel to Jerusalem to encounter God’s holiness.

But the story of Pentecost is how God’s presence now fills individuals through the power of the Holy Spirit.

The Body of Christ is the temple.

I am the temple of God.

YOU are the temple of God.

And so we have these lovely, good, and holy things happening that would you would expect in God’s presence… teaching and fellowship and reaching out to the needy.

But when we say that something is holy, we also have to acknowledge the danger.

We stand in God’s presence with fear, with awe, with trembling…

There is a line I love in “The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe” by CS Lewis which captures this idea perfectly.

The lion, Aslan, is a Christ figure in the narrative and one of the children is apprehensive…

“Is he quite safe? I shall feel rather nervous about meeting a lion.”…
“Safe?” said Mr. Beaver… “Who said anything about safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King; I tell you.”

God isn’t safe.

But God is good.

And God calls us to a better way of living.

We don’t have to be perfect.

But we do need to bring our full selves into this community.

We can’t simply dip our toes into the water and pretend.

In fact, the story of Ananias and Sapphira is not about how this couple should have sold all they had and given it to the community.

It was about the fact that they lied.

They could have chosen NOT to sell their property.

Or they could have sold the property and chosen to be up front about keeping some of the funds.

But they wanted all of the benefits and glory without actually doing the work.

As Peter says, they lied to the community and they lied to the Holy Spirit.

They disrespected the presence of God that was dwelling in their midst and are struck dead.

I started thinking about that scene from Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark when the Nazis think that they can open the Ark of the Covenant and take the power of God for themselves…

Dr. Jones and Marian know that God’s power is holy… They shut their eyes and refuse to look.

But the Nazis have no respect for God… only what God can do for them… and when they reach in to take it with fury and fire, God’s presence overwhelms them and their faces melt off.

Just like the priests in Leviticus who disrespected God in the temple.

You can’t use the presence of God for your own selfish purposes and you shouldn’t reach beyond your own limitations.

When I think about how we might apply this lesson to our relationships with one another today, I think about that idea of respecting the presence of God that dwells within each of us.

We need to respect one another enough to be honest.

If you aren’t able to say yes, then you should have the freedom and ability to say no.

We don’t have to pretend, but can simply bring ourselves and our gifts into this community without apologizing.

Whether they are gifts of finances, or time, or abilities and talents that you might offer.

You don’t have to sell everything you have to be included, or sign up to serve on every committee.

In fact, as we heard in one of our daily devotions earlier this week, you don’t even have to have a penny to your name.

Honor what you have.

Offer what you can.

God’s Spirit dwells within you and your gifts, however big or small, matter.

A flip side to this is that each one of us is called to honor and respect the gifts of others.

Sometimes we find ourselves in that ugly, jealous, comparative mode.

We think that someone is offering too little… and then rub it in or make them feel guilty.

Or we get overwhelmed by what someone else can do and become ashamed about our own value.

God’s presence is working through every person.

Be grateful and honor the faithfulness of each person you encounter in this community.

Our job is not to compare what other people can do… but to celebrate what every person offers.

The second real community problem that this early church struggles with has to do with some growing pains and, to be honest, some discriminatory behavior.

As the community kept growing, suddenly they began to notice there were differences among them.

It was all nice and good and warm and fuzzy to be able to hear in new languages on that day of Pentecost… but it’s a whole other kind of conversation to figure out how all of these different groups are actually going to live together.

And some people began to raise real and honest questions about equity in their midst.

While it might not have been intentioned, the widows who came from a more Greek, or Hellenistic cultural background, were being neglected compared to those who identified more with the Hebrew culture.

Someone stood up, and basically said, “Greek widows matter, too.”

If we are going to be a community that takes care of the needs of everyone, then we need to do what we say.

And when we aren’t living up to that value, if we are overlooking someone, then we need to address it.

What I love about this story is that there is an obvious flaw and problem in the community.

But the leadership listens and calls together the people to solve the problem.

And then they think outside the box.

They don’t just add a task to the job description of those who were already leading, but come up with a new and creative solution that actually allows more people to serve and engage in the work.

The church lifts up new leaders who can help make sure that each person is cared for in the way they deserve.

And these new deacons, servants, are blessed… commissioned… into this ministry of waiting tables.

Friends, we will encounter problems in our church and in our larger community.

There are times when we will be come aware that someone or a group of folks has not been treated fairly.

In fact, I’ve had this on my mind as we think about how this coming Saturday, our nation celebrates Juneteenth.

You know, I’ve never really thought about Juneteenth as a national holiday.

I’m going to be totally honest, I didn’t know what it was and maybe you don’t either.

Juneteenth is the day we commemorate the ending of slavery in the United States.

This date comes two and a half YEARS after the signing of the Emancipation Proclamation… but remember, this was not a time of 24/7 cable news.

It wasn’t until General Lee finally surrendered in April of 1865 and Union troops landed in Texas on June 19^th that the war ended and the word reached these communities that all slaves were free.

Now, every single American should claim this day as our own.

We didn’t always get it right, just as the early Christian community didn’t always get it right.

But we can do something about the harm.

We can listen to the pain and we can work for a better future.

And we can celebrate the steps we have taken, the leaders we have raised up, and claim the task that is still before us.

The early church was not perfect.

Because it was filled with imperfect people who were learning and growing and still discovering what it meant to follow Jesus.

And friends, we aren’t perfect either.

We are going to get it wrong.

We are going to make mistakes.

We are going to have days when we focus on ourselves and what we want and forget about others.

But the word I find in these chapters of Acts is this:

We are the Body of Christ, the dwelling place of God’s Spirit, and how we treat one another matters.

So we should hold one another accountable.

We should honor the presence of God that lives within us.

And we should keep working to do better every day.

May it be so.

Abiding in Love

Posted on May 13, 2018Leave a comment

Loneliness is a growing epidemic in our society.
Yes, I said epidemic.
Studies have now shown that loneliness and social isolation raises our stress hormones, causes inflammation, and can lead to heart disease, arthritis, diabetes, dementia, and more. In fact, some claim that it could even be a bigger health risk than smoking or obesity.

Being a part of community is good for your health.
In a world-wide study of “Blue Zones” or communities that are known to have residents that live 100 years or longer, they found that belonging played a role in three of the nine factors they identified.
They lived close to their families – often in multi-generational homes. And they had a tribe, a close circle of friends, that supported them in healthy behaviors. The vast majority of the centenarians belonged to a faith-based community.

Right here, in this faith community, we have been asking what it might mean to abide in God, to make our home in God, and to welcome others into that community of love. In these weeks since Easter, we’ve talked about what it means to be family, what it means to gather around God’s table, and what it means to return home to our faith.
If you haven’t noticed, one of the themes that keeps coming over and over again is that we need one another! We were created by God to be in community. And the fabric that holds us together is love. God’s love. Flowing through us.

This morning’s scriptures are no different.
In the first epistle of John, we are reminded that if you love a parent, you automatically love the children that come from that parent.
Those of us who love God have to keep God’s commandments – and that means that we show love to all of the children of God in this world.
This is how we overcome the forces of this world that would lead to death. This is how we combat loneliness and social isolation. This is how we help people live long abundant lives. God’s victory is known through love.

In John’s gospel, we are again urged to abide in God’s love and to love one another as Christ has loved us.
We have been chosen, appointed, sent forth, to share that love with the world.

I must admit that my faith in the ability of the church to truly love and accept all people has been tried a bit lately.
First, there is the ongoing tension of difference in the United Methodist Church when it comes to if and how we will accept LGBTQ+ people into the fullness of the life of our church. As more details come out about our bishop’s plan for providing a path forward as the church, we will have more indepth conversation here at Immanuel about what it could mean for us as a congregation.
But this week, we also released the results of five constitutional amendments that were passed at the 2016 General Conference. These amendments must be voted on by all of the annual conferences worldwide and be approved by a 2/3 margin. Three of them passed, but two did not.
The first amendment that failed will be up for a revote this year, because of an error that was discovered only after the results were released. But it dismayed me and others across the globe to learn that after 28 years of trying, we have again failed to constitutionally declare that men and women are equal before God and equal in the church.
The second amendment that failed, likewise, would have extended protections to more people in the church, eliminating discrimination on the basis of age, gender, ability, or marital status.
The rationale for why these amendments failed is complicated. In some cases, people thought they didn’t go far enough. In others, there were concerns about the potential ramifications for mandatory retirement or concerns about someone with intellectual disabilities being the chair of Finance or SPRC. In still other cases, the language about men and women was caught up with language about God being neither male or female in a way that troubled them.

What I see, however, is that we have failed to make love our primary motivation.
We have allowed fears to keep us from fully and without condition creating space in the body of Christ for every child of God to share their gifts.

Part of me didn’t want to share these results with you.
I wish that we were blissfully ignorant to the ways in which the church is a human institution and makes mistakes.
I know that many in this room aren’t even aware that the United Methodist Church has a constitution, much less what is in it.
But I also realized this week that one of the reasons that these two amendments failed is that as pastors, as leaders, as teachers, we don’t do a good enough job reminding one another that love is the source of our victory over fear, cynicism, and the ways of this world.

If I were to stand before you today and only talk about love, without also talking about how far we have yet to come, I would not being doing my job.
In the statement from our General Board of Church and Society, General Secretary Susan Henry-Crowe reminds us that “Mother’s Day was born out of appreciation for the tireless advocacy of women.” Anna Jarvis wanted to honor her mother’s life-long activism and in May of 1907, a Mother’s Day service was organized at the Methodist Church in Grafton West Virginia where her mother Ann had been a Sunday school teacher.
Could you imagine a church, could you imagine the body of Christ where women were not present or not contributing? Where women were cut off from the community? What would our church look like without women preaching or giving financially or taking care of the children in the nursery or preparing Wednesday night meals or leading the music.
The same question could be asked about if we had no older adults. Or children. Or divorced persons. Or single adults. Or folks with ADD or autism. Or men.

The community God intends for us is far greater than the one we would choose for ourselves. Perhaps that is why in the gospel of John, Jesus reminds us that we didn’t choose God… but instead we were chosen.
We were called into this community of faith to be in relationship with all of these people.
And our task is to love, honor, and celebrate the gifts of each person in this room.
When we combine our efforts and our talents and allow each person to fully commit to God’s work in this world – then that victory of love over the division and pain of this world will be complete.

When we close our service today, we are singing a good old hymn about when we all get to heaven.
But as we started our service, in the last line of Wesley’s famous hymn, we sang that we should own that love is heaven.
Heaven is not some far off place that awaits us when we die.
It is a reality that we make through our love of one another right here and right now.
And as we abide in God, we are reminded that we are also called to create room for others in this community of faith.
When every person knows the love of God and is valued and respected and honored… then we can sing and shout in victory… because heaven has been made real among us.
Amen.

self-haters no more

Posted on November 26, 2011Leave a comment

I am now in the habit of stalking my youth group members on facebook… not to see what kinds of mischeif they are into… but to remind them that they are amazing children of God.

I have often commented on the lack of respect among some of the youth in our community these days… but I have realized that it extends to (or maybe is rooted in) self-respect. Kids in this town just don’t believe in themselves. Or rather, they believe the hurtful and negative things that come out of their classmates’ and family members’ and “friends” mouths more than they will believe what is inside themselves.
These young men and women are smart. They are creative. They are quick to defend someone who is down. They are excellent athletes. And they don’t believe that they are worth anything. They spend too many hours a day getting yelled at or picked on or teased or putting other people down and puffing themselves up so that they WON’T have those things happen to them.

They really just need someone to remind them that they are loved.

That THEY matter.

That they are beautiful – inside and out.

That they have a whole lifetime of possibility in front of them.

That this particular guy or situation or game or mistake will not haunt them forever.

My top goal in youth ministry this next year is to respond to every self put-down I hear/see/read. I’m not going to let them get away with it. The world tears us down too much to tear our own selves down.

And even if they won’t believe that they have anything to offer… I can remind them over and over again that that is okay, too. That God takes us how we are and makes us amazing. That even nobodies can be vessels for God’s glory and power. In fact… being a nobody, being a misfit, being an outcast makes you perfectly suited for the work of the Holy Spirit. And that our Lord and Savior can take all of our pain and shame and anger and frustration and can hold it for us… can set us free and can help us really live.

Life is too short to belittle the love and the grace and the power of God that rests inside of me. too beautiful to ignore all of my special gifts and quirks and talents. I am a unique and wonderful creation, precious in his eyes. And each one of my youth are, too. I’m going to remind them of that…

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Posted on March 17, 2011Leave a comment

The world we live in today has radically changed.

The people in the world have changed.

And we haven’t quite figured out what that means… yet.

At the risk of sounding like an old, worn out, cranky person, I can’t figure out what is wrong with kids these days.

That’s at least where this post starts from. A frustration with the young people I work with week to week in youth group. They are energetic, quick to pick fights, easily berate and offend one another, like to have fun, push buttons, and exhaust me on Wednesday nights.

I’m not trained to be a youth minister. And the lack of respect for us as leaders and for one another as peers really drains and frustrates me. I’m not sure how to respond, how to build the trust that leads to respect, how to encourage them to think about what another person is going through. I’m stuck. But I love these kids and I’m going to keep at it.

What I have realized however, is that this is not just a problem I’m having with one particular group of kids.

Lack of respect is a larger societal problem.

And I think it has everything to do with authority.

I had read Carol Howard Merritt’s Reframing Hope: Vital Ministry in a New Generation a couple of months ago. In her book, she talks about the diffusion of authority, the growth of grassroots and networked communities.

I love this reality. I love the fact that more people have a voice and power and the ability to determine their own destiny.

Yet at the same time, I live in institutional structures that depend on authority and respect in order to work.

The role of the pastor used to carry with it respect and authority. The pastor was a leader in the community and people listened to what the pastor said. That is not the case, today, as people double check what their pastor says with what the latest television evangelist or popular religion book says. On the one hand, I applaud these efforts. But it makes it awfully hard to encourage my church to think in a new way when they keep hearing different messages from other places.

But not only pastors have this problem. So do teachers. So do medical professionals. So do scientists. So do community leaders. As power is distributed and shared, as knowledge is filtered downward, everyone thinks they know it all… or at the very least have access to the information.

Take the field of medicine for example. I’m not feeling well and so I check some online database and think I know what I have. So I go to my doctor and present my symptoms and now I have colored my answers with what I think I have. If my doctor suggest something else or running tests, I look for a second opinion. My doctor has to worry about me suing them or governmental laws and regulations and their own paychecks.

The fact that we all have power means that we no longer trust and respect one another. We are quick to assume the worst. We are not willing to see another person as our partner, but as a threat to what we know and believe and hold to be true.

We are living in this strange “inbetween” place. The postmodern diffusion of authority is a good thing… but our society has not yet fully adapted and been transformed to this new reality. We are living with feet in both worlds – one in which we have power and knowledge and another where there are experts in their field who have answers we need.

The simple truth is… we need experts. We need people who truly focus and go deep in certain areas of knowledge to ask questions you can only ask and answer if you live in that field.

I cannot spend my lifetime becoming proficient in Greek and weather patterns and geometry and quantum mechanics and the policy implications of petroleum based energy.

But for the decisions I make in my daily life, I might need access to that knowledge.

So, we need conversation. We need a two-way path between those who know things and those who have questions and insights from another perspective.

That cannot happen unless we respect one another. Unless we can ask questions without demonizing. Unless we can see the person sitting next to us as a human being who has just as much claim and voice and power as we do . Unless we are willing to assume that someone else just might have our best interests in mind. And unless we are ourselves willing to learn, to be taught, and to work for the common good.

What does all of this mean for postmodern youth ministry?

I think first of all it means that I have to respect the experiences and struggles that my youth are experiencing. I need to hear what they say and make sure they have a voice and are heard.

This entails not only personally listening, but also making sure that they are heard and respected by one another. The “how” of this first point is something I’m still working out. It works much better in smaller groups, but we just don’t have the number of adults needed to have small groups.

This has practical implications for how we plan our activities, the kind of ownership we give to our youth, and the rules/covenant we make with one another.

Second, as adults, we have to build our own trust with the youth from scratch. It doesn’t just come with the job. Just because I am 10-15 years older than they are and I’m a pastor does not mean they will listen to me. And every mistake, every slip up, will set us back all the way to the beginning.

This is part of the reality of our “inbetween times.” We simply wait for authority to rub us the wrong way and their cred is completely gone. Discounted. Done. If a teacher makes one mistake, they are colored that way forever. If a pastor says something you don’t like or agree with, you are out the door or stop giving. If a doctor makes one mistake, the patient goes elsewhere. There is no room for grace with the limited authority figures we do have.

Third, we need a structure and a covenant to get us through this. Respect is not going to be the first impulse of our relationships with one another and so we need to find ways of holding one another accountable. At the beginning of this school year, we worked hard to make a list of five things we would all agree to do in our life together.

But it has to stick. Our kids have to believe in what those things say. We as adults have to live by those rules ourselves. And we need to revisit it on a regular basis to remind ourselves of who we are and why we are here.

I don’t have the answers to this problem. Part of me wants to start from scratch, because what we are currently doing in our programs and relationship building is not working. All I do know is that our respect for one another, our ability to honor the authority each person brings, has to be the foundation for any work we do with one another.