spiritual discipline – Salvaged Faith

Fueled and Aflame

Posted on March 19, 2012Leave a comment

(this was one of those outline sermons… so here are the notes)

People everywhere… people here in this church, people in the community, other pastors, friends, family – are asking the question: How DO I live for Jesus?

The song we just sang was simple enough. The words were easy. The sentiment was real. We certainly seem to want to live for Jesus…but why do so many of us have such a hard time actually doing it?

In these past few weeks we have gone deep into Romans chapter 12 – the theme scripture behind our new church vision. We have explored some hard concepts like sacrifice, transformation, community and gifts. And every week that question keeps returning: Yes, Pastor Katie…. But HOW DO I DO IT?

How do I really sacrifice it all? How do I let God transform my life? How do I claim my gifts?

With our children, we talked about what fills us up – what gives us the energy to run, jump, go… and in many ways we are seeking the same answer. What will fill me up with good? What will change me? What will give me the strength/courage/energy to say YES?!

Nicodemus had the same question – How do I get eternal life and Jesus said… Believe into me

Live with me and for me. Trust me.

And then he talked about Moses: Snake on the staff – healing emblem of medical profession – Jesus on the cross, lifted up, high for all to see – look and you will be made well!

Numbers – poisonous snakes sent by God to the people because they were doubting and grumbling and complaining. Now, this wasn’t instant judgment, God’s intent wasn’t to kill, but a little bit of suffering in their midst helped them to refocus their attention on him. God wanted them to trust him. And as soon as they were ready to listen, God provided the cure – he said to Moses – “make a poisonous snake and place it on a pole. Whoever is bitten can look at it and live.” Moses made a bronze snake and place it on a pole. If a snake bit someone, that person could look at the bronze snake and live.” Numbers 21:8-9

We may not have poisonous snakes running around, but we have been bitten by sin. We are broken. We need healing. And as Jesus responds to Nicodemus and his brokenness and searching and longing… Jesus becomes the snake on the pole – we need to look to Jesus

Parable of the cave and the sun – cave goes out to see the light = great. Sun comes in to see the darkness = it no longer exists.

But if we stare at the cross for a while, nothing will happen… how do we focus on lives on Jesus? How do we invite Jesus in?

How do you keep yourself centered on God? How do you open yourself up to the Son coming into your life? What has worked for you in the past?

Eternal life – not just life everlasting… but the quality of life lived in God’s presence starting now

surprising indeed…

Posted on November 29, 2011Leave a comment

I have been trying to really practice the season of Advent this year. I have a nightly devotion by Adam Hamilton that I am reading (The Journey) and I have been following that advent calendar at bustedhalo.com each morning. They call it their “Advent Suprise Calendar” and it has truly brought me joy and really kindled some provoking thoughts, just in the three days I have participated already.

Every day there is a quote or a clip from some famous personality or character. And I think what is truly surprising is that you see a side of people you never typically see. You find them talking about their lives, their experiences of Christmas, and you realize that they are normal people. Normal people who might actually have a faith journey just like I do. In my “God on the Small Screen” blog, I have tried to do a similar thing with the television shows I watch… finding the redeeming, inspiring, and unexpected nuggets of faith, hope, and love in the secular world. So this whole Advent Surprise Calendar is right up my alley.

And then there is the microchallenge. A little poke in the right direction this time of year. A reminder of what this season of Advent is all about… preparing for Jesus to enter our lives once again. These little nudges invite us into relationship with friends and family and strangers, unlike many trite little reflections which offer a prayer and then you are done thinking about it for a while. Yesterday we were encouraged to play a game with a friend (which I didn’t get the chance to do), on the first day it was to share a hopeful story from the newspaper with someone we know. No chocolates here… no magic doors to open… but life and sharing and relationships are the little gifts we recieve as we journey towards the birth of Christ.

Take a peek… and join the journey!

outline preaching

Posted on April 13, 20101 Comment

Some weeks are hard for preaching. I usually am able to take the time to get into the texts and to prayerfully discuss them with colleagues and to stew over the gospel message as I do the things that it takes to be the church… and other things as well.

But some weeks, there is too much to do to take the time to write a manuscript. I lose hours of sleep on Saturday evening and Sunday morning painstakingly typing out the right words to say. I have always been a manuscript preacher and it takes so much more time… on the front end at least.

This last week, I had no time to write. I had thought and thought and thought… but there was no time to sit at my computer and write. I sat through deep theological conversations on death and life and the new creation (which was my sermon topic)… but there was no time to sit and write. I wrestled with what God was calling me to preach… but there was no time to sit and write. I spent time with friends I haven’t seen in a year… and there was no time to write.

Sunday morning at 6:15, I got up and took some of the jumbled thoughts that had filled my life for a full seven days and jotted them down. I put the stories in order. I found the natural flow of the message. I connected the gospel to the epistle in a quick comparison and contrast. I knew where I wanted to get and I trusted God would get it there. (or, rather, I thought I knew where God wanted us all to get and I prayed God would send the Spirit) And I let it be.

I think that Sunday morning – even with only 4 hours of sleep – was a good morning for preaching. Thanks be to God the Spirit showed up. Thanks be to God that I had the courage to step away from the pulpit to tell a story for only the second time since I’ve been here. Thanks be to God that I didn’t have it all written out and that the message flowed through me. Thanks be to God.

where two or more are gathered

Posted on February 18, 20101 Comment

Even though our congregation is small, I try to have two different services for Ash Wednesday. We have an older congregation and it is still wintery outside, so if we only had an evening service – many of our faithful wouldn’t venture out in the dark. But we also have a number of people who work and so if we only had a noon service, they would be missing out as well.

We had a pretty good turnout for our noon service. There were some technical difficulties as we tried to worship and sing without our usual pianst – but as someone said – that’s what makes it special!

I had all of the kinks worked out by the time our 6pm service rolled around. I had the candles lit and the words of repentance and transformation and discipline scrolling across the screen and music for contemplation playing in the background. I was waiting for the people to come.

And only one came.

I stood awkwardly near the back doors and let the opening sequence cycle through again. Maybe others are just late?… should we just go home?… ugh, singing with just the two of us isn’t going to work very well… alright, here we go!

“Well, J, it’s just you and me brother”

We read responsively the lyrics to the opening hymn and we heard the scripture proclaimed. We talked about what the ashes signify and spent time together, though silently in our prayer of confession. We marked one another with the sign of the cross. We dustied our foreheads to remind ourselves that we are mortal, we are brittle as year old palm branches, and we need God. We sat together going back and forth with joys and concerns and held hands as we prayed. We talked about the peace that we had found and the peace that we are taking with us into the world for others.

That worship wasn’t at all what I had expected it to be. But it reminded me that worship is an acting out of relationship. Our relationship to God, our relationship to one another, our relationship to the world. In our intimate encounters with one another, we can worship our maker. We can praise our Lord. We can repent of our sins. We can recieve forgiveness. We can offer back a part of ourselves. We can hear the words of grace and gospel. We can honor God. We can send one another forth.

Wherever two or more are gathered in my name… says the Lord. My prayer for Lent is that I make room for more of those holy and intimite experiences of relationship.

That experience last night has caused me to think much differently about my practices for this entire season, and so one of the things I’m giving up is the hours I spend in front of the television set, alone, wasting time. I’m allowing myself to watch when I exercise – b/c it’s what keeps me motivated, and if my husband wants to watch one of our favorite shows with me – because it is something the draws us close and we can have conversation about. But no more mindless hours in front of the t.v. set. I’m seeking out relationships with people and relationships with ideas and my relationship with God through conversation and game nights with others, and through dedicating myself to read some of those “God” books that have been sitting on my shelf for a while now and spending time in prayer and reflection around them.

FF: Touching Holiness

Posted on October 2, 2009Leave a comment

From Rev Gals:

Yesterday I was privileged to join the thousands of pilgrims who had flocked to York Minster to see the casket containing the bones of St Therese of Lisieux. People came from miles around, some with deep faith came to venerate the Saint, others with none came out of curiosity. The Christians who came represented a mix of denominations, I went because I have read her writings and out of sheer curiosity having never been to anything like this before.

To put it in crude terms I was blown away by the by the deep sense of God’s presence, of gentleness, of holiness and purity. Today as I reflect upon the experience I recognise that there have been other places and other times when I have experienced a tangible touch of God. I wonder if it was because the message that Therese had is so much needed today, she experienced God as a God of love, and encouraged others to draw closer…

Where do you find God’s peace and presence, is there:

1. A place that holds a special memory?
I have experienced worship around a round communion table twice – in the basement chapel at Simpson College and in the attic space of West End UMC. In both cases, we gathered around the table for sharing in the eucharist. Both had a small but faithful community who deeply yearned for something more in their relationships with God. Both were locations that were out of the way, and in some senses forgotten – but that’s what made them so special. In some ways – in the candlelight and in the stone and in the darkness they both remind me of the catacombs I experienced in Peru and in Europe – the faithful huddled together seeking God no matter what.

2. A song that seems to usher you into the Holy of Holies?
“I love you, Lord” always does that for me. Especially sung a capella. I first learned it in high school for our mission trip to Peru and I learned it in both english and spanish. And then in college, we would often sing it in a big circle while holding hands. And the harmonies we would create!!!!

3.A book/ poem/ prayer that says what you cannot?
Manifesto: The Mad Farmer Liberation Front
Every single time I read it, I pray it, I get goosebumps. It is earthy, it is challenging, and it reminds me that I have to practice resurrection in this life – that we taste it and touch it everywhere if only we look.

4. How do you remind yourself of these things at times when God seems far away?
I don’t. Which is a sad but true statement. I am desperately trying to put some of that holiness back into my life. I would really love to start a weekly evening communion service in my church, but I’m not sure how to do it without also sacrificing some of my family time. I guess the other part of that question is that I see God in all sorts of small moments throughout the day that I really just have to keep my eyes open – I just have to look

5.Post a picture/ poem or song that speaks of where you are right now in your relationship with God…
Tor Archer – Rooted Figure II I was looking for an image – mostly using my website title: salvaged faith. One thing lead to another and I came across this image. I would have posted it, but it’s probably under copyright – so I just linked. It brings to my mind the longing I have to be rooted in God, to be rooted to this earth, to be rooted in relationships. And rootedness really has this idea of deep life for me – unshakeable, firm, committed. It is the structure of our very being. I am not a hunter/gatherer. I am not a nomad (no matter how much the itinerant system says so). I am rooted in community and in that community I find God.

love list

Posted on September 26, 20093 Comments

Kristin T. over on Halfway to Normal has been talking a lot about love lists lately.

a list that you make over time detailing the things you love most in life—the things that make you feel most content in the world, and most like you.

She goes on to say that while this is very personal sort of thing, that there could be accountability built around sharing our lists with one another. So she lists four “steps”:

start making your love list! I love the part about how we shouldn’t just sit down and brainstorm, but we really should pay attention to whenever we feel complete and good and whole after we have done something – and THEN add it to the list.
Ask why that thing is on the list… what is behind it?
Share on twitter #lovelist
share progress on Halfway to Normal on Friday’s.

I’m going to do this!!! Mostly because I really need something to help me focus my life right now. Some days I feel like I’m just floating waiting for the next thing to come. Some days I feel like I’ve wasted so much time that I can’t enjoy the things I really care about. I feel like I’m making so many poor decisions (not major decisions – but little ones like how I spend the first 15 minutes when I get home) because I don’t have any criteria in place. I haven’t thought enough about my day to really consider what is the most important and what brings me the most joy.

This also makes me think about the fact that I haven’t yet done the Time Management audit my friend Jessica Miller Kelley suggests we all do. It helps us figure out our true priorities in our day so that we can figure out if we need things to change.

For me, this isn’t just some creative way to schedule. It really is a spiritual exercise. If the Holy Spirit is the agent of life and joy in our lives – than am I ignoring the Spirit on a day to day basis? How can I pay more attention to the gentle nudges? How can I better align my will with God’s will? Where do I need to adjust some things in my life and possibly even let go of somet hings, so that I can more fully experience the gifts and the blessings God has surrounded me with?

In three weeks, I’ll be joining other young adult clergy at a retreat and one of our “sessions” will be on time and scheduling. But I think in many ways this whole idea of priorities and what we love needs to be a part of that conversation. I can’t guarantee I’ll have a handle on anything by then, but if I make a start, maybe I’ll have something to offer to the conversation.

accountable.

Posted on February 26, 20092 Comments

So. I’m going back and forth over whether or not to post what my lenten discipline will be. I was all for it, and then I got to thinking about the whole “do it in secret” call of Matthew’s gospel… the appointed reading for Ash Wednesday.

At the same time however, discipline needs accountability. With no one else to check in on me, or watch over my shoulder and gently nudge… “hey katie…” will I keep with it?

Also… I’m only like 75% about what my actual lenten discipline will be. I like to abstain from one thing and take on one thing – and I can’t figure out what I’m going to take on. (which is kind of important, since, um, Lent started today)

So. I need the push to make a decision and having to post it and then follow through before heading to bed for the evening is important.

1) I will be abstaining from meat for Lent. This is something that I have done in the past, and now is a good time for my body to also be abstaining from the extra fats due to my upcoming surgery. Meat is a really tough thing for me because my families are such big meat eaters. Even in meals at home with Brandon, meat is always center stage. So having to think about other cooking options for myself, or eating less at a meal really is not a natural step for me. Everytime that I eat, I will be recalling this commitment to God I have made. And I love to eat. Meals now become this prayerful time of communion, rather than a hurry up and cook up some boring chicken and rice-a-roni. Not to mention the benefits on the planet (which God calls us to take care of) that a vegetarian diet entails.

2) My prayer life has been suffering lately. I’m just going to be honest. I have really struggled with what I need to boost that prayer life. Do I need to keep a prayer journal before bedtime? Maybe use art as an expression of prayer (like Jan Richardson) to try something new? I have a beautiful handmade paper journal that I haven’t used yet (thanks Jill!) and I’m going to bust it out this Lenten season. I’ll have it beside my bed with some colored pencils and chalk… and then maybe I can do both!

life breathed into dust

Posted on February 25, 2009Leave a comment

today as we come forward to have the ashes placed upon our foreheads, as we remember what it means to be made of the dust of the earth, we tell the truth about our mortality and our sin.

we are nothing but dust – and to dust we shall return.

yet there is something profoundly missing in that story. because even in the beginning, as God formed us from the dust of the earth, from the clay of the ground, as God got down on hands and knees and got dirty… molding us and forming us… we were touched with the maker’s hands. and then the God of the universe breathed into Adam the breath of life.

as dust – we cannot escape from our mortality or our sin. as dust – there is no end possible but to return to the ground.

but we are not merely dust. God desires not the death of a sinner but a broken and contrite heart. God wants to bring life into our midst.

this time of lenten discipline is a time to open ourselves up to God’s grace. That may come through spiritual disciplines like fasting and prayer. it may come from denial of temptations (coffee and soda, anyone?). it may come from an attentive awareness to God’s movement in everyday things. But none of these practices in and of themselves earn God’s love – will bring us salvation… we do them simply to spend time with God, we do them for the sake of God, practicing these disciplines focus our lives on God and that in and of itself brings its own reward.