youth ministry – Page 3 – Salvaged Faith

ham balls

Posted on February 14, 2009Leave a comment

Tomorrow evening we will be having a Ham Ball Dinner & Auction to benefit our youth group. And the Ham Balls we have at our church are AMAZING.

Ham Balls, if you don’t know, are like really big meat balls, made with ham. They tend to have a sweet & sour glaze or sauce to them. They are sooooo good.

When RAGBRAI (the Register’s Annual Great Bike Ride Across Iowa) came through town a year and a half ago, we hosted a Ham Ball Dinner with our “Out of the Park Ham Balls” and it was a really big hit. Since then, we’ve been looking for some opportunity to have another supper with these delicious hunks o ham – and our youth mission trip was the perfect cause.

worn out.

Posted on February 13, 20091 Comment

I am absolutely exhausted today. I think in many ways I’m just trying to get caught up from an overly busy and stressful week. We have a fundraiser dinner for our kids on Sunday that I’ve been getting ready for and in the midst of all of it, I have been working on some medical appointments for myself.

Evidently, what I had assumed were acid reflux attacks are actually gallstones. And my gallbladder needs to come out. Which actually is a HUGE relief for me. After I found out that it might be gallstones I started doing a ton of research and it really fits the symptoms that I have been experiencing. As does acid reflux. But if it is mostly gallstones – that means that many of my symptoms might go away. I had gotten so used to a number of the things happening in my body, I thought they were normal. I’m looking forward to actually BEING normal again. But until I got the results, there was a lot of stressful waiting. And now there is waiting to see when exactly the surgery will be scheduled and how much I need to do beforehand to prepare for my time off. And a huge part of me just wants to do it now – get it all taken care of, and have a solid week off to breathe and recouperate. It would be nice to get it done before Lent starts. But then again – that means finding someone to fill in for me on very short notice.

We also had two funerals in our church this week, and I have gotten back on track with visitation of our homebound members. But in my efforts to catch up, it meant that I visited five people in one day – which has me socially spent. I never doubt that I’m an introvert after visiting with people. They are dear and wonderful people, but it takes a lot of energy for me to spend time with people. As opposed to extroverts who gain energy when they spend time with people.

I really want to curl up all day – but I need to get the bidding sheets done for our auction, and I need to get the fancy Japanese beer for our Asian inspired fondu party in honor of Valentine’s Day with my sister and brother in-laws. Crap. And practice guitar. I’m taking lessons from my brother in law, but I always forget to practice. well, with the busy week I had, I didn’t take the time.

hard times

Posted on February 6, 20091 Comment

in our school community in this past year, ten students have made suicide attempts. thankfully, none have been successful.

last night, a panel was brought together for a community discussion about the issue and how we as a town can be more supportive of the students in our midst who are really having a tough time right now.

I don’t know what all of the factors are. I’m not sure if it is peer pressure and feelings of exclusion and isolation. Or stresses from their parent’s economic situation. Or the struggles of being a teenager who loves passionately and whose hearts are broken easily. Or the dangers and ups and downs of alcohol and drug use. It is probably different for each and every single one of our kids. And they all need our support.

Everyone there wanted to help. They all want to make our community the type of place where this never happens. But what I think (hope) we all got out of that conversation was that 1) we can’t make the problems go away and 2) all we can do is be there… truly be there for our kids. That means listening to them. That means paying attention to their problems. That means asking hard questions – including asking whether or not someone has been thinking about suicide.

I wonder if any of my kids feel like they can come to me when they are facing problems and depression. I hope that they would. I hope that I have communicated that to them. But I also know that as I work with them as a large group each week, I haven’t had the time to get to know each of them on a one-on-one basis. That is something I really really want to do this year.

Mommys

Posted on January 9, 2009Leave a comment

A few weeks ago, I blogged about my lack of a ‘mom look’ and so on the advice of lots of people… as well as something that I just knew I needed to do, I scheduled a youth/parent meeting to try to get more of our adults involved with the youth group. Our first gathering was postponed due to weather and so we met tonight.

We typically have between 3 and 15 kids show up for youth group. It’s completely hard to plan things when you have no idea who is going to show up. But I thought, if we have 10 of them show up with their parents for the meeting tonight, we’re gonna need a lot of food. I ordered 10 pizzas from Caseys. And when the meeting time came, there were only seven of us there. DOH!

By the time our meeting was over, we had a total of nine youth and five parents at the meeting. I talked with the kids about signing a youth group covenant – mostly about respecting one another and making the commitment to show up on time for events and agreeing to come with an open mind and a flexible spirit. They thought that was just fine and we also talked about what is going to happen if the covenant is broken.

But what I really appreciated was that through the whole thing, whenever the kids got to chatting just a little too much, one of the mom’s flashed “the look” in their general direction. Thank God for mommys!

I passed around among the parents a sign up sheet for treats/meals and helping to chaperone/supervise our weekly meetings. I think we have someone for almost all the weeks! I’m just kicking myself for not doing this sooner. We also discussed our summer youth trip and already have two solid yeses for our mission trip to Nashville – complete with deposit checks. Parents are terrific.

the mom voice

Posted on December 14, 20083 Comments

I’ve been struggling in recent weeks with whether or not I have the gift for youth ministry. Or whether I just can’t figure out how to reach this particular group of kids.

I spent some time talking with my mom about this recently, and came to the realization that I don’t have a “mom voice.” Or in the case of my own mom, “the look.”

You know what I’m talking about – the look that will stop you AND your friends from all the way across the gym at a basketball game. The look that strikes fear into your heart. The look that lets you know she means business.

I don’t have a look, or a voice. While you would think being a pastor carries with it a certain authority, that authority doesn’t really fly with these kids… so I have to muster up some kind of authoritative presence. Something like my own version of the “mom voice” is what I think is needed.

Part of the problem is that I’m so busy focusing on the lesson and the games that it’s hard to also be the babysitter. It’s hard to also keep everyone in line. I have no idea how teachers do it – I’m in absolute awe. I get tired after 45 minutes with my confirmation class of 7 students!

One solution is to get parents more involved… which is the focus of a meeting this Thursday night. Many prayers are needed that even just two or three of them hear the call and want to help out. If I don’t have my own mom voice, I’m just going to have to borrow someone else’s! =)

This whole thing I think also has me thinking about my own family. Is a mom voice something that develops when you have kids, or is it a natural gift? I’ve already figured out I’m the pushover when it comes to our kitties. Brandon’s the disciplinarian, the one who says no. Maybe it will always be that way… only time will tell.

I need a vacation…

Posted on September 24, 20082 Comments

or just a long long nap.

I was so looking forward to the back half of this week – especially sleeping in for a long time on Friday…

until I realized that we have our conference orders event Friday – and I have to get up at 6:30 just to make it there on time.

and then I remembered that I for some reason planned our youth lock in Saturday night…

HELP!

stumped

Posted on July 14, 20083 Comments

how on earth do I get through to my youth group kids?

this thursday was supposed to be our big summer start-up. Typically, if school is not in session, youth group doesn’t meet, but so many of them asked if we could continue through the summer that I said yes… for part of it at least. There were so many other things jam-packed into June that it just wasn’t going to work out very well. So we agreed July 3 would be the big day.

In the meantime, we were also planning a mission trip – a very short term one, because I have had no time to plan it. All the forms were sent out, reservations made, fundraisers put into motion, etc. etc. etc.

The first fundraisers we had… no kids showed up. So we went along and raised some money anyways. The next fundraiser we did… no kids showed up. But we made some money and put it in the account. The deadline came and went for forms to be filled out… and I have one form and one deposit in. That’s it. I extended the deadline… nothing. So the trip is now cancelled, or at the very least postponed until later this fall.

And then, the time to start back up with youth group – after I’ve talked with a few parents and seen a few kids… and I’m sitting there with my new devotions and a cool new game where we measure things around town in bananas… and I sit there. and sit there. and no one shows up.

I think that there are a few things to think about in this situation… 1) I have got to find a better way to communicate with my kids. Some have cell phones, and I tried text messaging everyone as a reminder before, which worked – okay. But not everyone has a cell. Not everyone gets messages if they are left at home. Almost everyone is busy working. 2) they and their families pretty much never show up on Sunday mornings… which also makes the chain of communication difficult. I have yet to meet most of their parents. 3) I’m a HUGE introvert when it comes to meeting new people and I really need to step it up and go visit these kids… except, I don’t always know where they will be. Whose parent’s house they will be at, if their parents/ guardians will be home, etc. But I really do need to step it up and just do it. Make the first step. Get it over with.

It’s not that I don’t want to meet their families. I suppose an extrovert wouldn’t understand, but it’s like this deep inner fear of saying the wrong thing or making the wrong impression. I just want to let them know I’m hear and I care about their kids and I would love to get to know them better. That doesn’t sound so bad at all! So why am I so terrified of it?!